February 13, 2012


The teaser trailer for Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter has gone online.  The film re-imagines our 16th President as a statesman by day and a vampire slayer by night.  This trailer proves three things: 1) Johnny Cash‘s reading of Revelations 6:1 (from “The Man Comes Around”) can dignify just about anything; 2) Abraham Lincoln knew axe-fu; 3) Fox is selling this movie as totally serious.  Not a hint of a joke.  Also, the action goes by so fast, that you can’t really appreciate most of the moves or even tell what’s happening.  Ultimately, audiences will look at this teaser and think, “That’s not a real movie, right?”

The film stars Benjamin Walker, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Anthony Mackie, Dominic Cooper, Alan Tudyk, Jimmi Simpson, and Rufus SewellAbraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter opens in 3D on June 22nd.

Trailer via Time:

Here’s the official synopsis for Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter:

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter explores the secret life of our greatest President, and the untold story that shaped our nation. Visionary filmmakers Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov (director of Wanted) bring a fresh and visceral voice to the blood-thirsty lore of the vampire, imagining Lincoln as history’s greatest hunter of the undead.


  • Romsy

    Sweet trailer, looks fun. Also, Matt, nobody wants your thoughts on the movie. After your last “article”on this film you should know better than to talk about stuff you have no idea about.

    • Frederick von Hoozle


    • therock525

      Yeah, Matt sucks…

    • Zumba

      I think what’s interesting is he probably thinks this is just Internet slander, that he should just ignore it. But, the reason why it is happening is because we speak the truth. Oh well, at least it’s entertaining.

  • Andrew Butler

    This movie, whatever it turns out to be, looks like a lot of fun! haha

  • Old Kentucky Shark

    That is unless those audience members who see the trailer happen to be aware that there was a book by the same title that was #4 on the New York Times bestseller list. But yeah no one pays attention to that list, so everyone will think this is a joke.

  • jarvis3205

    Amazing trailer. Loved it.

    I hate to be “one of those people”…but cmon Matt please!

    Are you so damned mad at the world of cinema that you crucify/stake everything in the heart right outta the gate?!?!

    This looks great.

  • henrieta

    “Ultimately, audiences will look at this teaser and think, “That’s not a real movie, right?”

    only if they are stupid as fuck

  • henrieta

    “Ultimately, audiences will look at this teaser and think, “That’s not a real movie, right?”

    only if they are stupid

  • Carlos

    I still think this is a fake movie. But then again I thought the same thing about Jack and Jill…

  • Guest

    Matt can’t you just give all the news about the movies you hate to Frosty, he at least knows how to enjoy movies and write positive articles that are pleasant for us to read.

  • Alex

    Normally Matt’s snarky town bothers me but at least here it makes sense. The trailer does do nothing to address the book or the absurdity of the story so one would be justified in wondering what the hell they just watched. And in further fairness to him you at least know he’s a real movie fan that has good taste, as you can see from his reviews. I’d rather have someone who knows what they’re talking about than some vacuous studio shill writing in all caps.

    • renner

      I don’t think anyone here truly believes Matt doesn’t know anything about movies, we just don’t want his personal opinions in regular news stories.

      It’s fine if he’s doing a review or a commentary on something, but his snark is completely unwarranted in articles where he’s supposed to just be relaying film news or trailers.

      Would you want to read a news report that is filled with how the reporter feels about the situation or do you just want the straight news so you can draw your own conclusions?And on top of that, what if everything the reporter had to say was negative?Would you find that informative?

      Articles by others on the site aren’t injected with their personal feelings.They certainly don’t offer a completely negative spin on everything they’re reporting on.So why does Matt’s articles?

      It’s getting to the point where I just skip over any article that has his name on it.

  • Bryce Forestieri

    Matt Goldberg is a piece of shit

  • knowledge

    Dear Matt… I feel you need to know, no one will ever care. You’re already that old dude that yells at kids who are on his lawn. You’re literally too cliche. But keep it up, because you’re the punchline for a running joke we have when we hear this fat friend of ours who has never really had a girl who rips on all the hot girls. “She’s too fat,” or “She is NOT hot. No way would I bang her.” We call it a goldberg because we know he wished he had the talent to tap that, but since he isn’t talented enough, he just rips on it.

    • Melissa

      Bless you knowledge! You said it ALL!!!

    • L.

      Haha! Preach!

  • JR

    That’s why it’s a TEASER. Its used just to get people talking about the movie which it has. Anyway stoked to see the full length trailer. Looks like alot of fun

  • Guns Of Navarone

    Matt Goldberg: Movie Slayer

  • mattedscreen

    um… did people forget that quickly how much Wanted sucked? Just wondering cus this movie(granted only seeing brief quick-cut) shots and no dialog… looks like crap! 300 had more realistic sets and action and that movie was a sewer drain for good talent. Loved the book, hope I can eventually saw the same for the movie itself.

    • Sccitylhh

      Oh come on. Wanted was trashy fun.

    • Brent

      More realistic sets….. vampire movie….. ok

  • Kimian

    looks fun….lets see the full trailer !!!!

  • Finn

    So Lincoln can do all this powerful, magical, vampire killing yet he’s felled by a bullet while watching the theater.

    • DerpyJones

      or is he? ;)

  • tk421

    I’m with Matt on this one. You get zero sense of tone, the action is too fragmented to get a sense of how it will play out in the film. It’s a poorly constructed teaser.

  • sean

    This movie looks terrible and the trailer has bad news written all over it. When they show that much stylized action there’s probably going to be awful dialogue. Also I just can’t take the concept seriously.

  • JohnP

    Teaser looked fun. Kinda reminded me a bit of Blade 2′s action scenes.
    Wanted was well directed, I thought, regardless of script/story issues so this could be fun too! :)
    Oh, Matt: Please dont try and make all the people who read the articles on here have the same, ill-conceived pre-conceptions about a film, months before a film even comes out!
    By all means, rip em to shreds in a review, but only once you have actually SEEN said movie!
    Unless of course you have some kinda ‘sight-beyond-sight’ and simply know how a film turns out even before the director does!
    Just saying… ;)

  • jordan

    of course the concept is a bit absurd, but what isn’t these days? And honestly, we watch movies to be entertained, and what form of absurdity isn’t more entertaining than the drab everyday of real life. I personally loved the book, and it is (as a stand alone novel) one of the most fun and one of my favorite books to date. The teaser looks badass and i cant wait for the movie, i’m glad Bekmambetov kept it serious and didnt go all hokey and campy with it. So thumbs up from me!
    P.S. Yes, Matt, you are a douche-nozzle. Just report the news and move on, no one needs your opinions in EVERY thing you report. I have been very much looking forward to this teaser being released and im glad i watched it before i read what you “reported” so i didnt go in to it with the taste of whiny ass vagina reporting in my mouth. Might’ve ruined the experience.

  • Joel Cunningham

    Matt Goldberg has no soul

  • Vince Gulbert

    I liked the teaser. Looked mighty interesting. Glad to know the great Lincoln kicked ass too.

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  • BustaCapp

    I’m sold. Alan Tudyk was all I needed to see in the cast to make me want to see this. Looks like a fun one!

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  • james

    Decent cast. Fun premise. I’ll watch. And just to throw my two cents in: I’d like to meet Matt, or at least see a picture of him, because he definitely sounds like the loser, piece of shit that everyone who reads Collider thinks he is.

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  • jymmymackiv

    No joking? What about when he exploded the tree at the end? I laughed so hard I cried. Just because it doesn’t have an out-and-out jokey tone, doesn’t mean it’s not meant to be absurd and humorous. If you have Lincoln on top of a train cutting down vamps, do you really need to throw a joke in there? Isn’t the image funny enough?

  • Billiam

    As a tremendous fan of honest Abe, you’d think I’d be appalled by the ridiculous premise of this film. But I do have sense humor. This thing looks pointless but harmless. Could be fun. What I’m truly looking forward to is Speilburg’s Lincoln coming later in the year.

  • trick

    In my opinion, its at best, a one-trick pony unfortunately spread over the course of an entire movie
    Similar to an effect created in Cowboys and Aliens, there’s only so much I can take before I’m thinking, “ok great, its Abe Lincoln, I got it..”
    At its worst, though, its borderline offensive, especially watching scenes of the Gettysburg Address followed by vampire slaying
    Seriously? Do we need this? No..
    I really hope the filmmakers here are careful.
    I’ve never read the source material but if they plan on addressing serious events like the many battles that occurred,theyd better be careful

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  • matt hater

    Hey Matt, Abe was an anti-semite too!!! And so is Jimmy Carter!!!

    • Zumba

      Don’t confuse him.

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  • Michael

    This looks goofy as hell.I can’t take the subject matter seriously.

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