February 12, 2008

Written by Nicole Pedersen

OK, quick!

Who is Ryan Reynolds? No, no that is Ryan GOSLING. Try again, I’ll give you a hint, he is romantically linked with Scarlet Johanssen…. Whoa, whoa sorry, I realize that field was too broad. My apologies.

OK, give up? Ryan Reynolds was that dude in “Van Wilder” a few years back… then he grew a beard and tried to get all ‘indie.’

You still have no idea who I’m talking about, do you?

Poor Ryan Reynolds, it is not that he isn’t talented it is just that he has two things preventing him from breaking through as a recognizable name. The first problem is, well, his name. It doesn’t exactly leap into your memory with its soaring uniqueness… there are a lot of Ryans and a lot of Reynolds out there.

Second: his choice of material. Last year Reynolds made three pictures, two of which, “Smokin’ Aces” and “The Nines,” could have both been named after fraternity drinking games. My mind can not distinguish one from the other at this point. They are both just kind of hazy, weird memories to me.

The third Reynolds project from 2007 has had a slow road to the box office. “Chaos Theory,” a film about a tightly wound efficiency expert (Reynolds) who learns to be spontaneous, has just debuted as a trailer. And here’s what I think:

Ryan who?

No, just kidding, but really, this film isn’t due out until November 30th at least I can not promise to remember who I am by that point never mind this bearded enigma of a would be movie-star named Reynolds. And what is with that “Raising Arizona” theme music? I am not stupid enough to go see one movie just because it has cool music from another movie in its trailer (All evidence of Grey’s Anatomy soundtracks in my possession to the contrary)…

If you are wondering where the sex doll is in Chaos Theory, you still haven’t gotten the right Ryan. Try again below.

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