Variety reports that “rapper-turned-actor” Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson will star in Mario Van Peebles’ football drama Things Fall Apart. I believe this story is inaccurate because “actor” implies ability to act and 50 Cent lacks that ability. Mr. Cent may let you know he’s willing to accompany you to the confectionery emporium, but he could not give a believable performance if his life depended on it. Watch Get Rich or Die Tryin’. Watch Home of the Brave. Then tell me with a straight face that he can act. Tell me a can of tuna fish with a smiley face on it wouldn’t do a better job in those roles.
Things Fall Apart, “centers around a star football running back, played by Jackson, who faces a personal tragedy as well as his own mortality while in his senior year in college.” Oh, sweet Jesus. Maybe on the page the character is supposed to lack facial expressions and has a speech impediment that requires slurred mumbling. If that’s the case, then 50 Cent is spot-on casting.