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In an action movie sequel, kids are deadweight.  Unless we're talking Short Round or some non-blood related child, all they do is showcase the taming of the wild, charming hero and a comic relief that isn't comic or a relief.  Even on television, when two characters have a baby, they try to shoo that kid off-screen as fast possible because he or she changed everything, as babies tend to do.

So when I read that Spider-Man 4 is casting "Toddler Boy", my spidey-sense starts going a little crazy.  Hit the jump for more details and speculation.

Spoiler TV got their hands on the following casting call:

Spider-Man 4 - Official Casting Call for Baby Boy with Red Hair

[TODDLER BOY]

2 or 3 year old boy to play 2 year old, Caucasian with RED HAIR, an adorable toddler with an engaging personality, on set experience preferred. IDENTICAL TWINS ONLY

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Wow, it's a good thing they're not looking for an ugly toddler, with a sullen personality, no on-set experience, and who has a paternal twin so the film can't keep continuity.

Now, I have three theories on this:

1) Peter and Mary Jane have spawned a child and now Peter has to deal with the added responsibility of being a parent in addition to his crime-fighting duties.  This sounds awful because if you take the other rumors we've heard as fact, you probably have Peter experiencing the lure of Black Cat, then the Lizard kidnaps the toddler and Peter discovers that protecting his family is his greatest responsibility.  Yawn.

2) It's a dream baby and Peter considers the responsibility that child would mean.  Or, it could be someone else's child but when Peter and Mary Jane see it, they begin to seriously consider parenthood.

3) It's a new villain.  This is the best-case scenario.

Spider-Man 4 is slated to open on May 5, 2011.