Fuck Citizen Kane.The Wizard is probably the greatest movie ever made.For the two people on the planet that haven’t seen it already, I’ll go over the amazing and somewhat profound plot for you.Jimmy (Luke Edwards) is The Wizard, a gifted kid that builds Duplo structures in an attempt to “express himself.”He has a mysterious desire to visit
They Jump into a Wonder Bread truck, which I’m sure in no, way, shape or form had anything to do with product placement, and head off on an adventure of a lifetime.
This movie is really about Nintendo.
While Corey is trying to purchase a bus ticket, Jimmy begins to play the Double Dragon arcade game.He gets 50,000 points!A (as the back of the DVD describes her) “resourceful girl” (Jenny Lewis) realizes the insane ramifications of this specific score. It means that Jimmy is…a wizard.Scratch that, he’s not a wizard, he’s The Wizard.He doesn’t even have to turn his trendy landscaping hat around like a switch, he’s just naturally the greatest Nintendo player alive.Corey proves this in a montage set the greatest score of all time, a rockin’ use of guitar that slowly transitions into the actual Double Dragon music in a way that will blow your mind. The “resourceful girl” decides they can make a lot of money playing against other kids.
After they raise enough money, they can enter him in an epic video game competition at Universal Studios,
You may still ask, “why is this the greatest film ever made?” You’re asking this because you’re an asshole that just skimmed over the previous paragraphs. Read them again. If you still don’t get it, you may be retarded. Still, I’ll give you more reasons if you really need them.This film features the best performance of Fred Savage’s career.This is the film that set him apart from his brother Ben as The Savage Brother (there can be only one).He has comic timing, and a handle of his character that should have given him an Oscar nomination.Jenny Lewis is also impressive as the “resourceful girl.”If it wasn’t for this film, she would always be known for her musical endeavors.Hell, she could cure cancer and she’d always been known primarily for this film.Christian Slater also gives the best performance of his career as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle loving brother, and pain in Beau Bridges’ ass.
The audio and video is fairly impressive. Fuck Star Wars. I’m just glad I got The Wizard in anamorphic widescreen. The audio is Dolby Digital 2.0, which will do in this case. When the “Beau Bridges is going to fuck up the bounty hunters car because he makes money off of little kids” cue blasts through your speakers, you won’t have any complaints. There are NO SPECIAL FEATURES. I don’t even want to get into that right now…