I love musicals.  I don't love all musicals but just going is a treat, no matter how bad it is.  They just have an infectious energy and even if you didn't even up liking it, you can't say you didn't get your money's worth because watching live actors sing and dance and remember all their blocking and giving it their all night after night is just a marvel.

So I don't know why anyone would need to be convinced to go see a musical but if anything can draw in the geek contingent, who I guess are "too cool" for musicals, it's "Spider-Man".  The only problem: it's not a musical.

According to The New York Post, director Julie Taymor asked theater insiders to steer clear of the word "musical".   Spider-Man, she added, "is not going to sing and dance in tights." A better description of her show, she suggested, is a "circus rock-'n'-roll drama."

Um…okay…

So this Circus Rock-'n'-roll drama, what's it going to be like?  The stage version of "Spider-Man" will be nothing like the movie franchise, Taymor said, adding that she drew on the old Marvel comics for the story and production design.

"Our show is going to have a comic-book, pop-up sensibility," she said.

The sets, drawings of which were on display, are brightly colored and enormous. The Chrysler Building, the Brooklyn Bridge and The Daily Bugle Building all figure prominently, their perspective skewed to match Spider-Man's shifting viewpoint as he soars through the city.

Well, that sounds…interesting.  I mean, comic-books aren't pop-up books and the dynamic of reading either is pretty different, but I think I get what she's saying. 

Peter Parker is at the center of the story, surrounded by a bunch of nerdy friends, a sort of "geek chorus," said bookwriter Glen Berger.

Oh no.

As Spider-Man, Peter clashes with a parade of Marvel villains -- Green Goblin, Carnage, Electro, Rhino, Swarm and Lizard.

Berger and Taymor have invented a new baddie for the show -- Swiss Miss, whose costume, designed by Oscar winner Eiko Ishioka ("Bram Stoker's Dracula"), consists of rotating knives and swirling corkscrews.

Oh, no no no no.  You named a villain after cocoa.  And she fights with corkscrews.  Did drawing people into a "Spider-Man" musical not seem difficult enough?

Five young singers performed six songs from the show, including the haunting "Rise Above," which is as good as any rock ballad in "Rent."

That is a ridiculously low bar.  I mean, is there a lower bar when it comes to modern musicals?

Bono [who is writing the songs for the musical along with The Edge] said he decided to write for the stage after attending a dinner honoring Andrew Lloyd Webber.

"I'd like to thank so many people," Bono quoted Lloyd Webber as saying. "But in particular, I'd like to thank rock musicians for leaving me alone for 25 years. I've had the theater all to myself."

Bono added, "We've decided to give Andrew a little competition."

Nevermind.