Leighton Meester Gets a ROOMMATE

     March 10, 2009

Written by Matt Goldberg

I’ve been crushing on Leighton Meester for far too long. Ever since I saw her guest spot on “24” back in season four, she’s made my heart go pitter-patter which I’ve been informed is a dangerous arrhythmia that I should really get checked out. But she’s just too pretty and yet despite her looks, I cannot watch her show, “Gossip Girl”. I have to keep reminding myself that there are lots of beautiful women in the world and none of them could ever make me watch more than five minutes of that awful, awful show.

But like almost all young, beautiful startlets, Meester is set up to deal with one thing in her career right now: dealing with psychopaths. According to The Hollywood Reporter, Meester has signed on to star in “The Roommate” where she plays “Sara, a college student who is randomly assigned to a freshman dorm with a stranger named Rebecca. Things turn deadly when Rebecca becomes obsessed and begins targeting people in Sara’s life.” Man, that is so relatable. My freshman year of college, my gay roommate had sex in my bed while I was away. Didn’t find out about it till three months later and so I learned a valuable lesson: always wash your linens regularly because you may be sleeping in someone else’s fuck.

Chances are this film won’t be anything good or memorable but as long as Meester is on a hit TV show, she won’t have to worry about taking better projects (but she should totally go after them because if God answers my prayers, “Gossip Girl” won’t last forever).

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