Matt Live-Blogs the 2010 Oscars

     March 7, 2010


Just as I did with this year’s Golden Globes, I will be offering my live-blogging this year’s Academy Awards.  I will mock as fast as I can update my posts.  I’ve already made my picks known and now we’ll see if they pan out.  It’s possible that I’m underestimating Avatar‘s momentum in the technical categories, but I usually get 75% of my picks right so I’m hoping that trend continues, so I’m hoping to meet or beat that average.  Also, here’s what I’m chancing for the short categories: Logorama (Animated Short), Instead of Abracadabra (Live-Action Short) and China’s Unnatural Disaster: The Tears of Sichuan Province (Documentary Short).

After the jump you’ll find my commentary.  My latest update will be at the top.  Just keep refreshing this page to see my latest comments on all-things 82nd Academy Awards ceremony.  I hope you enjoy tracking my mood swings based on winners and losers (although Oscar Goddess Sasha Stone wisely reminds us all that the trick is not minding), and mockery of the night’s events.

(All times Pacific since I’m blogging from the West Coast)

[I have now altered the live-blog to read in chronological order for all those who didn’t follow along tonight.]

4:36 — 24 minutes until Hollywood self-indulgence!

4:56 — After these commercials!

4:56 — Let the game begin!

5:01 — So the red carpet starts at 5pm?  Lame.  But now I can pretend I have fashion sense and comment on dresses.

5:04 — Oh, Clooney.  Stop being charming.

5:06 — Efron’s hair has been Pattinson’d.

5:10 — Sorry, Christopher Plummer.  You cannot have fun over 14.  It’s science.

5:13 — How many people have stepped on Jennifer Lopez’ dress at this point?

5:15 — Sarah Jessica Parker’s skin is wearing Jersey Shore.

5:23 — Winslet’s dress is the best I’ve seen so far tonight.

5:24 — Turns out that huge cheer was for Chazz Palmenteri (as well it should be).

5:26 — So the ceremony is going to begin now?  Fer realz?  Okay.

5:27 — Right after these commercials.

5:30 — Now it begins. And it looks like all the nominees (in the major categories) will get to be on stage to open the show.

5:31 — Okay, just Best Actor and Actress. Weird start, but whatev.

5:32 — NPH opens the show?  Can we just keep him for the whole thing?

5:33 — I love how you need NPH’s talent to make the Baldwin-Martin combo seem exciting.

5:36 — Okay, that Invictus joke was good.

5:37 — If the jokes are going to be Martin and Baldwin bantering jokes, I may be able to get on board with this show.

5:38 — Holy crap.  I’m laughing pretty hard at some of these jokes (loved the Streep/Hitler memorabilia joke).

5:40 — Clooney is unamused at Toyota jokes.

5:42 — I’m shocked at how sharp these jokes are.

5:43 — Why does Baldwin keep lapsing into a British accent?

5:43 — Yeah, a transcript of this show is so stup– Aw, crap.

Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds

5:48 — His Golden Globe speech revolved around astronomy, this one is about sailing.  But it’s a nice speech and of course he deserved the award.

5:55 — The set is very nice.  Very intimate.

6:00 — Here’s Amanda Seyfried to make Miley Cyrus look even more unattractive.

Best Original Song: “The Weary Kind (Theme from Crazy Heart)”

6:12 — “It’s a collaboration between handsome, talented people and sickly little mole people.  I Heart RDJ.

Best Original Screenplay: The Hurt Locker

6:15 — This deserved to go to Inglourious, but I’m not upset it went to Hurt Locker.  Also, I like how they’re now saying, “And the winner is…”

6:17 — And now the brief tribute to John Hughes.

6:22 — No disrespect, but why does John Hughes get his own In Memoriam section as opposed to all the other people in Hollywood who died last year?

6:23 — Commence all Snakes on a Plane-Up jokes.

6:28 — The short film categories: where Oscar-prediction success rate goes to die.

Best Live Action Short: The New Tenants

Best Documentary Short: Music by Prudence

Best Animated Short: Logorama

6:37 — Those are Ben Stiller’s real ears.

Best Makeup: Star Trek

6:42 — You can now say, “Oscar-winner STAR TREK” (you can also say “Oscar-winner SPEED,” and it’s true).

6:49 — I guess there’s a lot of In the Loop that can’t really be quoted on network TV.

Best Adapted Screenplay: Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” by Sapphire

6:50 — First big upset of the night.  I guess the adaptation controversy and general disdain towards Reitman have led Up in the Air to not winning a single award to night.  Keep in mind, it was the front-runner earlier in the season.

6:51 — Um, that dude forgot to thank Sapphire.

6:54 — My earlier theory about why Up in the Air lost is just a theory.  Smarter people than I will make better ones soon.

Best Supporting Actress: Mo’nique, Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” by Sapphire

7:00 – And a Standing-O for Mo’nique.  But the Academy isn’t about politics?  Her award wasn’t, but there are plenty of others that are.

7:05 — Sigourney Weaver looks amazing.

Best Art Direction: Avatar

7:07 — “This Oscar sees you.”  I just vomited.

Best Costume Design: The Young Victoria

7:11 — I would love it if the winner of  Best Costume Design came on stage wearing something they bought at Macy’s.  Also, that was a bitchy little speech.

7:18 — Hey, horror fans!  Let’s have the stars of TWILIGHT introduce an honorary segment to your beloved genre.

7:21 –That was an enjoyable Tribute to the Academy Not Knowing What Qualifies as a Horror Movie (or even good horror movies).

7:23 — This little segment really is  necessary since most viewers don’t know the difference between Sound Editing and Sound Mixing.

Best Sound Editing: The Hurt Locker

Best Sound Mixing: The Hurt Locker

7:27 — Yes.  Sound was so crucial for The Hurt Locker and well-deserved.

7:34 — No time to cut to the Cinematography nominees!

Best Cinematography: Avatar

7:36 — Bleh.  The White Ribbon was gorgeous.

7:37 — And now time to group in Swayze with other dead people.  Let us remember Michael Jackson for his incredible film, Moonwalker.

7:46 — Sam Worthington, please do not chew gum on stage at the Oscars.  It makes you look sleazy.

7:47 — I would really like it if one of these dancers exploded during the interpretational dance of The Hurt Locker.

7:48 — It’s The Hurt Pop-n-Locker.

7:49 — When I think of Up, I think of the Robot.  Also, co-director Adam Shankman got his start in choreography.  Ugly, ugly choreography.

7:51 — And when I think Avatar, I think break-dancing.

Best Score: Up

7:53 — Great speech from Giacchino.  And it’s well-deserved.  He’s one of the best composers working today.

Best Visual Effects: Avatar

7:55 — And Best Visual Effects go to Visual Effects: The Movie.

Best Documentary: The Cove

8:05 — And now Tyler Perry’s Awful Presentation of an Award.

Best Editing: The Hurt Locker

8:07 — The Hurt Locker has won almost every category it deserved to win.  And a shout-out to Sam Raimi!

Best Foreign Language Film: El Secreto de Sus Ojos

8:17 — Anyone seen this film?  Thoughts?

8:23 –So far I’m 15/20.  75% success.

8:24 — So this is where they’ll take the page from last year, but this year it’s friends, not past winners.

8:26 — And this is how they’ll grind the show for the next thirty minutes.

Best Actor: Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart

8:33 — Far out, man!  A very happy acceptance speech.  Fun to watch even if we all knew he was going to win.

8:40 — What the hell, Forest Whitaker!  How much weight has he lost?

8:44 — And you get an Oscar!  And you get an Oscar!  Everybody gets an Oscar! [Cue the loop of Winfrey peeing in Beloved]

Best Actress: Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side

8:49 — A very charming speech from Bullock.  Again, would’ve preferred Streep but no problem with Bullock winning it.

8:52 — I think that’s the best acceptance speech of the night.

Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker

8:55 — Well deserved, Ms. Bigelow.  Yes, it’s a historic win, but let’s not boil it down to an affirmative-action win.  She just plain deserved it.

8:58 — A very nice speech from Bigelow.

Best Picture: The Hurt Locker

8:59 — Good job, Academy.  You chose wisely.  I’m overjoyed that my prediction in this category was wrong.

9:01 — I thought it was a good show and a great finish.  Thanks everyone who watched the ceremony and kept up with my commentary.  It’s really appreciated.

Winners in are marked in red:


- Avatar

- The Blind Side

- District 9

- An Education

- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- Precious

- A Serious Man

- Up

- Up in the Air


– James Cameron, Avatar

- Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker

– Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds

– Lee Daniels, Precious

– Jason Reitman, Up in the Air


- Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart

– George Clooney, Up in the Air

– Colin Firth, A Single Man

– Morgan Freeman, Invictus

– Jeremy Renner, The Hurt Locker


- Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side

– Helen Mirren, The Last Station

– Carey Mulligan, An Education

– Gabourey Sidibe, Precious

– Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia


– Matt Damon, Invictus

– Woody Harrelson, The Messenger

– Christopher Plummer, The Last Station

– Stanley Tucci, The Lovely Bones

- Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds


– Penelope Cruz, Nine

– Vera Farmiga, Up in the Air

– Maggie Gyllenhaal, Crazy Heart

– Anna Kendrick, Up in the Air

- Mo’Nique, Precious


- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- The Messenger

- A Serious Man

- Up


- District 9

- An Education

- In the Loop

- Precious

- Up in the Air


- Coraline

- Fantastic Mr. Fox

- The Princess and the Frog

- The Secret of Kells

- Up


- Ajami

- El Secreto de Sus Ojos

- The Milk of Sorrow

- Un Prophete

- The White Ribbon


- Burma VJ

- The Cove

- Food, Inc.

- The Most Dangerous Man in America: Daniel Ellsberg and the Pentagon Papers

- Which Way Home


- China’s Unnatural Disaster: The Tears of Sichuan Province

- The Last Campaign of Governor Booth Gardner

- The Last Truck: Closing of a GM Plant

- Music by Prudence

- Rabbit a la Berlin


- The Door

- Instead of Abracadabra

- Kavi

- Miracle Fish

- The New Tenants


- French Roast

- Granny O’Grimm’s Sleeping Beauty

- The Lady and the Reaper (La Dama y la Muerte)

- Logorama

- A Matter of Loaf and Death


- Avatar

- Fantastic Mr. Fox

- The Hurt Locker

- Sherlock Holmes

- Up


- “Almost There” from The Princess and the Frog

- “Down in New Orleand” from The Princess and the Frog

- “Loin de Paname” from Paris 36

- “Take It All” from Nine

-  “The Weary Kind (Theme from Crazy Heart)” from Crazy Heart


- Avatar

- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- Star Trek

- Up


- Avatar

- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- Star Trek

- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen


- Avatar

- The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

- Nine

- Sherlock Holmes

- The Young Victoria


- Avatar

- Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- The White Ribbon


- Il Divo

- Star Trek

- The Young Victoria


- Bright Star

- Coco before Chanel

- The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

- Nine

- The Young Victoria


- Avatar

- District 9

- The Hurt Locker

- Inglourious Basterds

- Precious


- Avatar

- District 9

- Star Trek

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