Watch This: Every Michael Bay Movie in under a Minute

     June 30, 2011

Transformers: Dark of the Moon is 154 minutes long but did you know you could condense every Michael Bay movie in under a minute?  It’s true and the folks at CollegeHumor have done exactly that!  While I think some Bay movies are better than others, he certainly has a formula that earns both massive box office and massive scorn from critics.

Hit the jump to check out the video.

Via CollegeHumor.


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  • Tarek

    I think that Michael Bay has something to do with the global Warming, with all the explosions he made.

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  • Collin V.

    This is so true, it’s hilarious.

  • Stinky

    Yes. Michael Bay films are unique, for better or worse.

    Regardless, we need Bay films. Big budget, exploding, mindless, testosterone-filled, popcorn films for the summer.

    What would we do without the Bay action flicks of the past 10-15 years? Yawn through mediocre Tony Scott efforts, fall asleep during inept Renny Harlin turd-bortions, go crazy wondering what the hell happened with John McTiernan films, or hang ourselves after suffering through the next Roland Emmerich debacle.

    I offer you that the Bay alternative is far worse.

    • Michael

      Can’t get much worse than Bay’s Transformers movies. So, to me, his movies are just about at ground zero.

      Speak for yourself, because I don’t need his movies, and I know there are plenty more people like me.

      There are more to movies than the typically brainless, poorly written action flicks that clutter up the summer time.

      • Old Soldier

        Yeh, more time for another 2 1/2 hr “Blah,blah,blah,blah-get The Gimp!” Tarantino movie.

    • Oliver

      Im sure J.J Abrams and Christopher Nolan could muster some worthy alternative summer viewing. Oh wait – they already have. And if they’re not testosterone enough for you; lets wait and see who takes over on the Transformers franchise – if they’re given a similar budget to Bay, they’re going to make him look like a fool, whoever it is!

      Its hard to think of someone who the studios would feel safe handing over to, unfortunately. And the above mentioned wouldn’t be interested. But I’d say someone like The Wachowski Brothers would be a good fit – they’re very capable, but not so good they wouldn’t take the job. Would anyone second that motion?

    • Tony

      I’m no Michael Bay hater. I actually like the guy. His films are mostly well cast (Except Transformers) and are usually shot well. He’s a very good “technical director”, and I think he would make a great director of photography. However Tony Scott is FAR BETTER than Michael Bay. He knows how to develop his characters and make us care about them, THAN adds in the action scenes and violence. True Romance, Man on Fire, Enemy of the State, and The Fan prove that.

  • Tarek

    We have the Nolan alternative. Not worse at all…^^

  • JD

    No offense but i would much rather see a Bay Transformers than a Nolan transformers. Nolan does the realistic and gritty movies to perfection, but that just doesnt seem like it would fit the transformers universe.

    • tarek

      No offense, but Nolan will do a more interesting movies than this nonsense mecha-things. ^^

  • SV7

    There are hundreds of directors who would have given us a Transformers movie better than Bay’s rubbish. A big difference is that other directors would actually get a good script together before making the film. Look at Vaughan’s X-men: First Class. Awesome action plus character and story. There is no comparison. Give him the Transformers reboot.

    When the action is boring in a Michael Bay film, you really have nothing to stick around for. In Transformers, the action was badly executed camera wise and in T2 it was so badly edited and staged it was long and tedious.

    Bad Boys and The Rock at least had cool action, combined with some funny humour, thrills and character. Transformers do not compare to these movies on any level except scale and the quality of the FX.

  • Miles Bennett Dyson

    I like Michael Bay, and even his knockoffs are good Simon West and Dominic Sena

  • sense 11

    A simple fart would have worked too

  • the hate

    Bay’s making money,movie’s & filming hot babe’s & your all bitching on an internet movie website!
    Bay-win’s Internet commenters-don’t :)

    Have fan bitching fucktards.

  • Mike

    The dude that made fun of Tarantino…. you have no credibility now. Never compare Bay to him or any of the directors that have been mentioned. You referred to Pulp Fiction and compared it to this Transformers I believe? Good God there has to be something wrong with you. Tarantino doesn’t need a gigantic budget and a shitload of special effects to impress me, nor do the other directors I have read in these comments. Think of Bay without his explosions, without his special effects, without the hot women, he would be nothing. Please, make sensible comparisons when doing these argument things.

  • BumbleBee #1

    For all of you “Bay Haters”, look at the numbers his movies pull in. Obviously you like him, otherwise you wouldn’t go see his movies and make him rich. STFU and stay home next time.

    • shaunx

      agree with u !!nobody is forced to watch !!!

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  • Old Soldier

    Hey Mike, Read my statement again. Yes I compared Bay to Tarantino, as two different kinds of directors. Bay makes long drawn out, violent, blow-em up, jumbled badly scripted(OPTIMUUUUSSSS!)action movies that don’t make sense to a lot of people. Tatantino makes long drawn out, violent, talky-talky,badly scripted(You know what they call a 1/4 pounder in France?)soap operas that make even less sense to even more people. Think Tarantino without his ultra violent beatings, 5mins of action in a 2 1/2 hr movie,and the ass rape he would be nothing. At least Bay’s characters don’t sit around a table and talk about playing cards for 1/2hr.

    • tarek

      Agree. Both share the same Stupid style.

  • Nick82

    so they pretty much only stuck to about 4 or 5 of his movies: umm lets see … the rock, transformers 1 & 2, bad boys 2, and armageddon, oh yeah pearl harbour … so it isn’t every one, only a few. not to say that they wouldn’t all fit, but it coulda been funnier if they’d come up with material that hasn’t already been said a MILLION times about michael bay movies. What they don’t say is that despite his stuff being drivel, he knows his genre (drivel) and how to deliver up action on a silver platter. plus they’re usually entertaining as hell, even if they do become dated relatively fast. and by the way, he doesn’t CREATE the stereotypes he portrays in the flicks, we do. hate to rain on everyone’s parade, but really … the bay bashing is getting a lil old. we get it: his movies don’t have a lotta substance, but i’d rather see his stuff than anymore fockers, or eddie murphy, or jack black, or vampire, or superhero, or half-assed remade/rebooted/reimaginat​ions, or “based on true story” type movies any day of the week. peace.

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