PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 5 Reportedly Titled PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES

by     Posted 1 year, 39 days ago

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If you were eagerly awaiting the title for Pirates of the Caribbean 5, I personally don’t understand that.  In any case, you no longer have to wait because This Is Infamous is reporting that the full title for the fifth Pirates movie will be Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales.  If the film is as bad as the last one, I’m sure there will be a rush on lame review headlines reading: “Dead Men Tell Bad Tales” or “This Is a Tale That Shouldn’t Have Been Told”.  If the film is a success, well, I’m a bit skeptical considering how much I disliked On Stranger Tides.  And if Tell No Tales is just as bad and just as big of a box office hit, I’ll stand by for the sixth movie, Pirates of the Caribbean: Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Who Gives a Shit.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is set to open on July 10, 2015.  Johnny Depp will return to star, Jeff Nathanson (Rush Hour 3) wrote the screenplay, and Kon-Tiki‘s Joachim Rønning and Espen Sandberg will direct.




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  • Chase

    Hahahaha, that’s a pretty terrible title.

    But let me say I hate you Matt Goldberg. I HATE you. I hate the fact that you always put your negative opinions in your posts. I hate that you rarely like any movie. I hate how you think you’re hilarious. I hate how instead of putting a well reviewed film next to Jeff Nathanson (like I dont know, Catch Me if you Can or Tower Heist or hell, even Rush Hour 1?) you made sure to put one of his worst reviewed movies on there, Rush Hour 3. We get it Matt, you hate Pirates of the Carribean. Along with everything else in the world.

    Jesus what a desipicable prick you are.

    I like every other writer on this site though!:D

    • indy42

      This is one of the best comments I’ve ever read. A+.

    • Devin Reed

      Amen! I can barely stand to read Matt’s articles these days. Report the news, and leave the opinions for the comments section.

      • Me

        And you still read his articles.Why? I mean you sound like you read his articles consistently. I don’t but I think if the comments and opinions are allowed here then the author should have it as you do. If you don’t like it there are other sites. Including those that keep only positive comments about On Stranger Tides and the “”Great Depp.” Why not stick to those? I am a fan of POTC but I don’t like how the franchise degraded to the low-quality money-squeezer. POTC fans deserve better than that. I know I do.

      • Me

        And you still read his articles.Why? I mean you sound like you read his articles consistently. I don’t but I think if the comments and opinions are allowed here then the author should have it as you do. If you don’t like it there are other sites. Including those that keep only positive comments about On Stranger Tides and the “”Great Depp.” Why not stick to those? I am a fan of POTC but I don’t like how the franchise degraded to the low-quality money-squeezer. POTC fans deserve better than that. I know I do.

    • Marc

      then why are you reading them?

      • DeadMenTellNewTales

        Because maybe he didn’t know Goldberg wrote it until after he read the headline.

      • Leo Spaceman

        No, you can normally tell its a Goldberg article by the fourth sentence.

    • http://collider.com Matt Goldberg

      Jeff Nathanson is fully responsible for the screeplay for Rush Hour 3. He has a “written by” credit as opposed to a “screenplay” credit which means other people worked on it.

      And I actually think the first three Pirates movies are great. That’s why the fourth one is such a let down.

      But I guess I’ll just have to live with your hatred, person I’ve never met and will never meet.

    • James

      Fully agree with this. Honestly I sometimes read his reviews specifically to see how embarrassing it is. The most hilarious (not at all in a good way), sad, and cringe-worthy parts are when he is trying to be funny. It is seriously an abomination to comedy, it is almost sickening because you’re just thinking this guy thinks he is hilarious when he couldn’t be further from the truth. Please for the love of God keep your embarrassing jokes in your head instead of typing them to further destroy your pathetic opinions on entertainment (of any kind).

      • Strong Enough

        shut up please

  • HeyZeusKreesto

    As always, a negative opinion about a piece of news that isn’t even really news. I agree that the last one wasn’t too good, but they did set things up for a potentially good sequel if the writing is good. Though with the decline in quality after the first movie, I’m cautiously optimistic.

  • http://illusion0flife.wordpress.com/ IllusionOfLife

    As a fan of the Pirates fo the Caribbean trilogy, I can safely say that I am so over this franchise. On Stranger Tides was a nearly unwatchable black hole of a movie, and Depp’s schtick has worn more than thin. If Verbinski was onboard I’d perhaps be curious, but at this point I couldn’t be any less excited for a new Pirates movie. A rather sad ending to a series that was once fun and unique.

    • Bob James

      I’m sure the entire franchise will collapse without you. In fact, in you hurry and let them know how you feel, they may just cancel this one, and not make any more.

  • tertiaryintervention

    The titles are getting longer and longer.

    I can’t wait for Pirates of the Caribbean: Tokyo Drift

  • Stefan Bonomo

    Am I the only person that truly likes On Stranger Tides? Probably.
    I’m still anticipating this. I don’t think the Pirates formula has run out yet, there’s still a lot you could do. And the fact they’re bringing in a new pair of directors and new writers, maybe that will spruce things up from what many people disliked about the last film.

    • shelleybear

      No, I like it too.
      Certainly better then three.

    • Zoidbert

      I liked it quite a bit; actually, It’s probably my favorite of the series; maybe tied with the first one. But they’re all quite entertaining, though I think “At World’s End” is the “Return of the Jedi” of the series.

  • Sean

    @MattGoldberg One correction: Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Men Tell No Tales theatrical release date is actually Friday July 10th 2015, not Wednesday July 15th 2015.

    • Tom

      He was too busy writing how he hates “Pirates of the Caribbean” to check it out.

      • Sean

        I was correcting him. It’s not my problem if he hates it the Pirates of the Caribbean movies.

    • http://collider.com Matt Goldberg

      Fixed!

  • Juan

    Your way too negative….even on a article about a movie title. I’m all for opinions and hearing them, but you should know that your opinions do suck most of the time. Do you realize that you probably drive more people away from this site than bringing in.

  • Bob James

    Hey Matt Goldberg, go fuck yourself. Seriously, properly, go fuck yourself. That might be closer for you to a real job, anyway.

  • Person

    Article’s opening line is so awesome haha

    • Julio Navas

      I think you are somehow related to Goldberg.

      • Person

        I’m not, it was just so unexpected it caught me off guard and I laughed. But I don’t dislike Goldberg as much as most.

  • Julio Navas

    Matt, go write for TMZ. You are so pathetic, cause i think the only reason you are so negative about everything is because you want to stand out among the other writers as the only one who is recognizable from Collider. Let me tell you something, a lot of trashy people is recognizable too, but that doesnt make them special, and you are on the top of that list.

    • Strong Enough

      stop it. you sound crazy

  • TWEET FROSTY!

    Everyone should Tweet Steve (@colliderfrosty) and tell him how annoying Matt is. It’s the only way something will be done about Matt. It’s one thing to bash a movie (although it’s not funny at all and just makes him look like an ass), but it’s another to bash your readers. So what if I was looking forward to what Pirates 5 would be called?! I’m weird, now?

    Go fuck yourself, Matt. Seriously.

  • TWEET FROSTY!

    Everyone should Tweet Steve (@colliderfrosty) and tell him how annoying Matt is. It’s the only way something will be done about Matt. It’s one thing to bash a movie (although it’s not funny at all and just makes him look like an ass), but it’s another to bash your readers. So what if I was looking forward to what Pirates 5 would be called?! I’m weird, now?

    Go fuck yourself, Matt. Seriously.

  • TWEET FROSTY

    Everyone should Tweet Steve (@colliderfrosty) and tell him how annoying Matt is. It’s the only way something will be done about Matt. It’s one thing to bash a movie (although it’s not funny at all and just makes him look like an ass), but it’s another to bash your readers. So what if I was looking forward to what Pirates 5 would be called?! I’m weird, now?

    Go fuck yourself, Matt. Seriously.

    • http://collider.com Matt Goldberg

      It is weird, but there’s no need to take it personally. It’s also weird to try and get someone fired because you don’t agree with them or don’t like their writing. No one’s forcing you to read my stuff. There are plenty of other places where you can get news without opinion. That’s not here. We don’t want to be studio mouthpieces.

      You can tell me to fuck off, but you don’t even have the guts to post under your real name. I put my name to everything I write, which is more than I can say for you.

      Also, if you spam the comments section, we’ll ban you. I don’t care if you don’t like me, but you’re not free to clutter up the comments section.

      • Alex Hajna

        I didn’t want to spam the comments. It was a defect in the Disqus system or something. And it wasn’t my intention to get you fired. I just meant to have Frosty say something to you, so maybe you’d tone it down.

        I didn’t post under my real name, you’re right. It was cowardly of me. But I’m posting under my real name this time, because I’m apologizing. I was in a horrible mood earlier. Usually, you’ll find me defending the ones who talk shit about you on here. But I was in a shitty mood when I read this, so here we are.

        So I apologize for being a dick. But you shouldn’t call out your readers like that. I wasn’t looking forward to the title of Pirates 5, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little curious. My point is, you never know what your readers’ opinions are on something.

      • Alex Hajna

        I didn’t want to spam the comments. It was a defect in the Disqus system or something. And it wasn’t my intention to get you fired. I just meant to have Frosty say something to you, so maybe you’d tone it down.

        I didn’t post under my real name, you’re right. It was cowardly of me. But I’m posting under my real name this time, because I’m apologizing. I was in a horrible mood earlier. Usually, you’ll find me defending the ones who talk shit about you on here. But I was in a shitty mood when I read this, so here we are.

        So I apologize for being a dick. But you shouldn’t call out your readers like that. I wasn’t looking forward to the title of Pirates 5, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little curious. My point is, you never know what your readers’ opinions are on something.

      • Bobby

        He’s just saying what everyone says on all of your posts all time.

        And by acting your sanctimonious opinion in your posts doesn’t make you a rebel movie blogger you just like any other internet guy trolling the web

  • Kale

    My god, you people have forgotten what it means to have to report these kind of things. You lowlives like to have the news told to you as if you were reading a history lecture? This is awful, he’s trying to give his personal opinion to you about these movies, so it won’t sound like the marketing dept wrote it. Plus, he (as for anyone you douches) has a right to give his personal opinion for an article or review. If you don’t like: DON’T READ IT! Please for the love of God, quit acting like immature children, posting notes that we should fire someone, for their reporting. He’s can’t help it that he and other writers have to report that title of the FIFTH Pirates of the Caribbean. Also, he’s doing his job, so why would Steve fire someone for doing their job.
    At least I have the guts to post my name out there.

  • Kale

    My god, you people have forgotten what it means to have to report these kind of things. You lowlives like to have the news told to you as if you were reading a history lecture? This is awful, he’s trying to give his personal opinion to you about these movies, so it won’t sound like the marketing dept wrote it. Plus, he (as for anyone you douches) has a right to give his personal opinion for an article or review. If you don’t like: DON’T READ IT! Please for the love of God, quit acting like immature children, posting notes that we should fire someone, for their reporting. He’s can’t help it that he and other writers have to report that title of the FIFTH Pirates of the Caribbean. Also, he’s doing his job, so why would Steve fire someone for doing their job.
    At least I have the guts to post my name out there.

    • Kale

      Zooey guys for some of my grammar and word choice, but I still don’t think you should crap on a reporter, because of his reporting and sense of humor.

    • Kale

      Zooey guys for some of my grammar and word choice, but I still don’t think you should crap on a reporter, because of his reporting and sense of humor.

      • Kale

        God, I hate spell check on apple products! Anyway, I meant to say “sorry guys for poor grammar and word choice, but I don’t think we should crap on a reporter, because of his reporting and sense of humor.” There you go!

      • Kale

        God, I hate spell check on apple products! Anyway, I meant to say “sorry guys for poor grammar and word choice, but I don’t think we should crap on a reporter, because of his reporting and sense of humor.” There you go!

  • http://collider.com Matt Goldberg

    So as you may have noticed, I changed the opening sentence of the article because some people felt like I was being insulting by saying “you’re weird”. That wasn’t my intent. I honestly meant it as a friend jibe (other people think I’m weird for liking the second and third POTC movies; that doesn’t bother me). I just found that eagerness to be a little odd, but I should know by now that it’s rude to dismiss other people’s fandoms. If I can learn to accept Twilight fans, I can certainly learn to accept people who didn’t feel burned by the 4th POTC movie and are excited for a fifth go-round.

  • http://collider.com Matt Goldberg

    So as you may have noticed, I changed the opening sentence of the article because some people felt like I was being insulting by saying “you’re weird”. That wasn’t my intent. I honestly meant it as a friend jibe (other people think I’m weird for liking the second and third POTC movies; that doesn’t bother me). I just found that eagerness to be a little odd, but I should know by now that it’s rude to dismiss other people’s fandoms. If I can learn to accept Twilight fans, I can certainly learn to accept people who didn’t feel burned by the 4th POTC movie and are excited for a fifth go-round.

  • Dingalong

    Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Lone Ranger would have been better.

  • Dingalong

    Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Lone Ranger would have been better.

    • Sean

      Nope.

    • Sean

      Nope.

  • Saurav

    Guys, movies are subjective in nature and everyone has their own opinion about it. So abusing Matt or someone else would not do anyone any good. We all are movie lovers and that is the only reason we are here on collider. Lets keep it to that and we could discuss in a civilized manner.

    P.S : I do not agree with Matt’s opinions on most count but as i said ‘art’ is something, on which everyone can have a different opinion. No point in abusing Matt for this.

  • Saurav

    Guys, movies are subjective in nature and everyone has their own opinion about it. So abusing Matt or someone else would not do anyone any good. We all are movie lovers and that is the only reason we are here on collider. Lets keep it to that and we could discuss in a civilized manner.

    P.S : I do not agree with Matt’s opinions on most count but as i said ‘art’ is something, on which everyone can have a different opinion. No point in abusing Matt for this.

  • Me

    I agree with the author. On Stranger Tides is the unwatchable rubbish. I’ve been a fan of POTC for several years but On Stranger Tides is a insult to the fans of the franchise.

    Everyone has own reasons to like or dislike a movie. To me POTC are dead without my favorite characters – Will Turner and Elizabeth. I loved POTC1 and POTC2. POTC3 script is a disaster but Will Turner is one of the best good guy characters I’ve ever seen on screen and Orlando Bloom is brilliant in that role. I like Norrington a lot and Jack Davenport performance but they got rid of him mercilessly.

    I’ve seen POTC1-3 several times in a movie theatre but I never paid a cent for On Stranger Tides. It was on my cable several times and it took me several attempts to watch it (the 1st time it took me the opening scene to turn it off) to make my opinion on it. Here it is:

    the script is bad, weak cinematography (why the heck they needed 3D at all for such?), bad montage, the directing is beyond hopeless, VERY poor job on camera and lights departments, boring acting and weak supporting cast (Penelope Cruz, really? Who is next – Paris Hilton?). I understand that they wanted Depp’s acting look stronger and they surrounded him with the weaker actors. It backfired: he works better with the stronger actors (like Bloom, Rush, Davenport, Bill Nighy,etc.). In OST Rush did his job good as usual but his personage is ruined because he could be the competition to the Bruckheimer’s favorite. The original score to the POTC1-3 is brilliant and can be considered as a modern classic but for the 4th movie it was a washed-up and bleached slap-dashed pot-boiler.

    Overall: the movie looks like it was made for the IQ challenged and it has too much of Depp who is bored with his own performance: it’s too visible – he can’t offer anything more about the personage he is playing and he totally doesn’t care that the said personage is behaving OOC. Aside of the fact that Depp never was able to carry a movie on his own, the Bruckheimer’s idea that the comic relief character can be the main leading personage was a failure from the beginning. Sparrow has its place in the original trilogy but without the strong main heroes (as Will and Elizabeth are in the original trilogy) and the strong supporting characters he is nothing but an old clown whose jokes are not funny anymore. BTW, I never liked Jack because he is a selfish coward but he was supposed to be it in the original trilogy to complete his task as a catalyst. He never was a total anti-hero but he still is the anti-hero who ruined the lives of the good people who saved him many times and I can’t possibly like him. Trying to make a “hero” out of him is not convincing.

    I really miss Will Turner played by Orlando Bloom but if Disney won’t beg him to come back the POTC franchise I’m not seeing the 5th movie even on cable.

  • Me

    I agree with the author. On Stranger Tides is the unwatchable rubbish. I’ve been a fan of POTC for several years but On Stranger Tides is a insult to the fans of the franchise.

    Everyone has own reasons to like or dislike a movie. To me POTC are dead without my favorite characters – Will Turner and Elizabeth. I loved POTC1 and POTC2. POTC3 script is a disaster but Will Turner is one of the best good guy characters I’ve ever seen on screen and Orlando Bloom is brilliant in that role. I like Norrington a lot and Jack Davenport performance but they got rid of him mercilessly.

    I’ve seen POTC1-3 several times in a movie theatre but I never paid a cent for On Stranger Tides. It was on my cable several times and it took me several attempts to watch it (the 1st time it took me the opening scene to turn it off) to make my opinion on it. Here it is:

    the script is bad, weak cinematography (why the heck they needed 3D at all for such?), bad montage, the directing is beyond hopeless, VERY poor job on camera and lights departments, boring acting and weak supporting cast (Penelope Cruz, really? Who is next – Paris Hilton?). I understand that they wanted Depp’s acting look stronger and they surrounded him with the weaker actors. It backfired: he works better with the stronger actors (like Bloom, Rush, Davenport, Bill Nighy,etc.). In OST Rush did his job good as usual but his personage is ruined because he could be the competition to the Bruckheimer’s favorite. The original score to the POTC1-3 is brilliant and can be considered as a modern classic but for the 4th movie it was a washed-up and bleached slap-dashed pot-boiler.

    Overall: the movie looks like it was made for the IQ challenged and it has too much of Depp who is bored with his own performance: it’s too visible – he can’t offer anything more about the personage he is playing and he totally doesn’t care that the said personage is behaving OOC. Aside of the fact that Depp never was able to carry a movie on his own, the Bruckheimer’s idea that the comic relief character can be the main leading personage was a failure from the beginning. Sparrow has its place in the original trilogy but without the strong main heroes (as Will and Elizabeth are in the original trilogy) and the strong supporting characters he is nothing but an old clown whose jokes are not funny anymore. BTW, I never liked Jack because he is a selfish coward but he was supposed to be it in the original trilogy to complete his task as a catalyst. He never was a total anti-hero but he still is the anti-hero who ruined the lives of the good people who saved him many times and I can’t possibly like him. Trying to make a “hero” out of him is not convincing.

    I really miss Will Turner played by Orlando Bloom but if Disney won’t beg him to come back the POTC franchise I’m not seeing the 5th movie even on cable.

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