Funny “Alternate Ending” to RETURN OF THE JEDI

by Matt Goldberg    Posted:January 11th, 2011 at 1:45 pm


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Return of the Jedi could have been a much darker movie.  No, I’m not talking about killing off Han Solo or Luke walking off alone like a wandering samurai.  I’m saying it’s a good thing the rebels calculated the blast radius of destroying the second Death Star.  Otherwise, teddy bear celebration would have been replaced with awkward-yet-glorious silence.

Hit the jump to check out an “alternate ending” to Return of the Jedi.

Via BoingBoing.

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14 Comments

User Comments (14 Responses)
  1. aaronsullivan @ January 11th, 2011 4:14 pm

    I lol’d even with the spoiler story. I admit it.

    Reply
  2. PBMom @ January 11th, 2011 4:44 pm

    That is a riot. Love it.

    Reply
  3. Smceneaneyirl @ January 12th, 2011 2:58 am

    Is this actually real!! Looks like someone did a copy and paste concering there is no one talking, crying screaming etc!!!

    Reply
  4. Erica S @ January 12th, 2011 11:06 pm

    There’s actually a lot of work in the fandom about this. I hate to give them traffic (because I think it’s too much fanboy wank), but here it is: http://www.theforce.net/swtc/holocaust.html

    Reply
  5. juan cela @ January 13th, 2011 8:23 am

    I am spanisch screwrentier films

    Reply
  6. William Desmond Taylor @ January 13th, 2011 1:27 pm

    It was funny to me… and I’m dead.

    Reply
  7. Kenobi-fan @ January 13th, 2011 1:44 pm

    An extremely entertaining analysis! Having said that, the ability to destroy a planet (and/or the Death Star) is insignificant next to the power of The Force. The destruction of the Emperor is blatantly ignored as is the power surge/vacuum that occurred immediately after. It is clear that there are greater energies at work than those that earthly physics can explain in so far as Star Wars is concerned. I think it more than possible that in destroying Palpatine, Anakin not only saved his son, he also saved the Ewoks from apocalyptic doom…an act only possible, perhaps, after The Chosen One truly became one with The Force.

    Reply
  8. Alex @ January 13th, 2011 2:44 pm

    I love Jedi. Just thought I’d say that.

    Ewoks and all.

    Reply
  9. cynic @ January 14th, 2011 8:46 am

    If I’m not mistaken, in the authorized fiction that comes after the movie (check your local bookstore, there’s mountains of it still coming out) the empire, such that it still is, uses this as propaganda against the rebels, including the fact that radioactive material from the death star powerplants eventually fell on the moon, and the ewoks are now extinct

    Reply

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