Rookie Writer Summons The Power of GRAYSKULL

     May 12, 2009

he-man_underpants_01.jpgI don’t know what screenwriters aspire to.  Clearly, it depends on the screenwriter, but I wonder how many lay awake at night and think to him or herself, “I wish I had the chance to re-adapt the cartoon ‘Masters of the Universe’ into a live-action film because I could really capitalize on some goofy nostalgia.”  Whether Evan Daugherty had that dream or not is unknown but he will be coming on board to rewrite Justin Marks’* script for “Grayskull” because you don’t want your movie about He-man to sound un-cool with a title like “Masters of the Universe”.

According to The Hollywood Reporter (who act like Daugherty committed the artistic crime of the century by getting this job; he’s not adapting Faulkner, here), Warners sees the big-screen version as a gritty fantasy and re-imagines Prince Adam (He-Man when he calls on the power of Grayskull) as a soldier who sets off to find his destiny, happening upon the magical world of Eternia. There, Skeletor has raised a technological army and is bent on eradicating magic.

I’m sorry.  You lost me at “gritty fantasy”.  It’s Masters of the Fucking Universe.  You can’t just have fun with it?  He-Man had a Prince-Valiant haircut and wore furry underwear.  Who wants a “gritty fantasy” from that?  Who is so emotionally retarded that they need their silly property about a man who cries out “I have the power!” to be deadly serious?

C’mon, Daugherty.  Prove the haters (read: me and people who agree with me) wrong and make this film entertaining and not just an attempt to cater to he-men-children.

*Who, as the go-to guy for adapting “Street Fighter”, “Voltron”, and “Shadow of the Colossus”, probably did have that dream

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