I’m not a negative person, but it’s come to my attention that what I intend as mockery is interpreted as bitter disdain.  I just think a lot of things are funny and this is a job you can’t take too seriously.  Sure, there are events that pissed me off this year like Roger Friedman happily bootlegging X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but I understand I’m not writing about the atrocities in Darfur or the meltdown of the U.S. economy.  I write about movies and I’m very happy to do so.

Of the five films I think were the “worst” of 2005, all of them were screened for critics.  If a film was deemed too terrible to give the public a heads-up, then I think that speaks for itself (although G.I. Joe proved an exception as the majority of my friends told me it was surprisingly enjoyable).  However, I respect all filmmakers who put themselves out there and even the worst film deserves my admiration because filmmaking is a grueling process which takes months; in comparison, it takes me about an hour or so to criticize it.

Finally, two of these films I just think are silly and while terrible, they’re mostly harmless.  The other three, well, I have a bit more to say about them.  Hit the jump for the countdown.

It looks like the exhausting press cycle director Quentin Tarantino has been on over the past two weeks (NPR to WWE) paid off in the end.  A $14.3 million Friday has morphed into a $37.6 million dollar opening weekend for Tarantino and his “Inglourious Basterds”.  It was a question mark to many how the World War II film would fare commercially – so that sound you hear?  It’s the collective sigh of all Weinstein Co. employees whose jobs are now a hell of a lot safer.

It seems a little unfair to rip into a movie like “Post Grad”.  I don’t mind doing it with a movie like “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” because it comes from strong source material, has solid actors, and cost a $150 million to make so a failure is not only a disappointment but a little offensive.  But “Post Grad” is so insipid, so in love with its empty characters, barely able to understand its own premise, and comes to such sickening conclusions, I can’t let it pass.  When the only way to survive it is to wonder how the next scene will be worse than the one that came before, I feel justified in ripping the film apart since it ripped apart my soul for what felt like an eternity.  I can’t understand why Fox Searchlight didn’t dump this straight to DVD and now it’s gonna be taking up 1,958 screens this weekend and wasting the time of those foolish enough to pay a ticket because they thought the movie looked kind of cute judging from the standee in the lobby.