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by Matt Goldberg Posted:March 31st, 2010 at 10:21 am
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The trailer for Sylvester Stallone’s The Expendables has come online and it’s not good. It spoils the Schwarzenegger cameo (we knew he was in the film, but they didn’t have to show us his scene), every attempt it makes at humor falls flat, the part where it tries for soulful reflection is where the movie looks funny, and I think the picture has become clear that this is what happens when you make a movie based solely on servicing the fans of B-action pictures. Oh, and when they do all the actors’ last names at the end of the trailer they leave out Terry Crews. No one leaves out President Camacho. Also, Stallone looks like hell and should really lay off the human growth hormone.
Hit the jump to check out the trailer and the official synopsis. The Expendables hits theaters on August 13th.
Click over to Yahoo! Movies to see the trailer in HD.
Here’s the official synopsis for The Expendables:
THE EXPENDABLES is a hard-hitting action/thriller about a group of mercenaries hired to infiltrate a South American country and overthrow its ruthless dictator. Once the mission begins, the men realize things aren’t quite as they appear, finding themselves caught in a dangerous web of deceit and betrayal. With their mission thwarted and an innocent life in danger, the men struggle with an even tougher challenge – one that threatens to destroy this band of brothers.
Barney Ross (Sylvester Stallone) is a man with nothing to lose. Fearless and void of emotion, he is the leader, the sage and the strategist of this tight-knit band of men who live on the fringe. His only attachment is to his pickup truck, his seaplane and his team of loyal modern-day warriors. His is a true cynic who describes what he does as “removing those hard to get at stains.” The team behind him is made up of Lee Christmas (Jason Statham), former SAS and a savant with anything that has a blade; Yin Yang (Jet Li), a master at close-quarter combat; Hale Caesar (Terry Crews), who has known Barney for ten years and is a long-barrel weapons specialist; Toll Road (Randy Couture), a skilled demolitions expert and considered the intellect of the group; and Gunnar Jensen (Dolph Lundgren), a combat veteran and an expert in precision sniping who struggles with his own demons.
When the mysterious Church offers Barney a job no one else would take, Barney and his team embark on what appears to be a routine mission: overthrow General Gaza (David Zayas), the murderous dictator of the small island country of Vilena and end the years of death and destruction inflicted on its people. On a reconnaissance mission to Vilena, Barney and Christmas meet their contact Sandra (Giselle Itie), a local freedom-fighter with a dark secret. They also come to learn who their true enemy is: rogue ex-CIA operative James Monroe (Eric Roberts) and his henchman Paine (Steve Austin). When things go terribly wrong, Barney and Christmas are forced to leave Sandra behind, essentially giving her a death sentence. Haunted by this failure, Barney convinces the team to return to Vilena to rescue the hostage and finish the job he started. And to perhaps save a soul: his own.
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What are you talking about? Your comments sure are hit or miss. This trailer was awesome and it's exactly what is was supposed to be – bad ass 80's action stars with one liners and explosions in the background. Now if only they had somehow managed to get Jean-Claude Van-Dammn.
The only issue I have with the trailer (other than Crews not getting a mention, seriously wtf?) is that the opening voice over isn't cheesy enough. The VO is pure 80's action cliche, but it's not as tongue-in-cheek as I would've liked.
They also kind of spoiled the money shot of Arnold, Bruce and Sly in the same scene together, but I guess they had to have at least something like that in there.
I agree, still looks fucking awesome to me. Not sure what the writer of the article is expecting, filled w/ cheese is what the tagline for this movie should be.
End of Line
I just love all this manaction.
I will make sure my mom drives to to see this movie opening day.
For me, this is the first preview I've seen that made me think I have to go see this. I actually laughed out loud once, too. Really not getting the review of this trailer at all except for the cameo thing.
I'm a little disappointed at the cameo scene being shown, but I really think it needs to be shown if they want to fill the seats. Hopefully it's clear enough to most people that it is indeed just a cameo.
Matt Goldberg, do you only like Clint Eastwood movies? Wet blanket would still be too aggrandizing for you.
I agree with everyone. THis looks cool. I think it's exactly what it was trying to be. I just wish JCVD would have said yes. I do understand his reason for not doing it though.
They tried to get JCVD but he declined. It would've been 100x better if he were in it.
I've had my share of wet blankets.
I'm sure Jean Claude and Arnold will be back for the inevitable sequel. Kurt Russell will join the team to replace either Crews/Couture/Li/Lundgren. Maybe they can get Antonio Banderas too.
That bloke has got issues.
Mr Goldberg, you are mistaken. This looks wonderful – pure, cheesetastic fun. And of course they have to show Willis and Schwarzenegger in the trailer, to get the general public interested. It's only a snippet of a five minute scene, so I don't see the problem.
This looks so friggin amazing. Can't wait. The blogger is 100% wrong. He should stay in the closet. Don't ask Don't tell dude!
I am with you Jonathan, this move is going to be totally Bad ASS!! WOOOO!!! Stalone looks great…I hope to look that good when I'm 30! Anyway, I will say I am a little bummed they included schwarzenegger in the trailer, as that would have been something to look forward to seeing on the big screen. But all in all, I think this will be Sly's Magnum Opus to Action Adventure. It is a shame they couldnt get Van Damme…a DAMME shame lol…anyway, Sly, you always got my vote!
Looks better than the first trailer. Still definately hit or miss, but I think the cameos and all the supporting actors actually make this more interesting than if it was just Stallone himself.
Well, I saw the trailer for Jean Claude's movie The Eagle Path (the movie he was working on instead of taking the role in Sly's movie) and it looks to be as if he's getting back to his old roots. Kinda reminds me of Maximum Risk mixed with a little Hard Target. Was the trailer of The Eagle Path better than Sly's…well personally, not really. But seriously, I think Jean Claude should have taken the role, I really don't think he knew what type of movie this turned out to be and he being in it would have brought him closer to getting some more work in the states. With movies like JCVD and Universal Soldier: Regeneration I think The Expendables would have been a good fit. But all we can do now is watch this flick for what it's worth. Me, really looking forward to seeing this despite the writer negative spin on the trailer.
Well, I saw the trailer for Jean Claude's movie The Eagle Path (the movie he was working on instead of taking the role in Sly's movie) and it looks to be as if he's getting back to his old roots. Kinda reminds me of Maximum Risk mixed with a little Hard Target. Was the trailer of The Eagle Path better than Sly's…well personally, not really. But seriously, I think Jean Claude should have taken the role, I really don't think he knew what type of movie this turned out to be and he being in it would have brought him closer to getting some more work in the states. With movies like JCVD and Universal Soldier: Regeneration I think The Expendables would have been a good fit. But all we can do now is watch this flick for what it's worth. Me, really looking forward to seeing this despite the writer negative spin on the trailer.
Become a fan of the Expendables facebook page! Watch the trailer, check out movie stills and read about the cast – http://www.facebook.com/expendablesmovie