When I read previous log-lines for Kevin James and Rosario Dawson's upcoming "comedy", "The Zookeeper", I didn't know the animals actually talked.  I was under the impression that the premise of "animals teaching their caretaker methods of dating and mating" was to be done through body language and skillful editing.

But because the premise of having a guy like Kevin James win over a woman like Rosario Dawson through the help of zoo animals isn't outlandish enough, the animals actually talk.  With celebrity voices.  There will come a day when we will no long be able to devise an exaggerated parody of Hollywood product and that day will most likely be the one when "The Zookeeper" hits theatres.

According to Variety, the following celebrities either need money/want to be in a film their kids can enjoy/hate you: Adam Sandler, Cher, Jon Favreau, Sylvester Stallone and Judd Apatow.  Nick Nolte, Jim Breuer, Faizon Love and Bas Rutten are also in negotations to join with Nolte voicing a gorilla.  Nolte will not be aware of his participation in the film but rather, someone will just follow him around with a tape recorder and edit accordingly.

With this soul-crushing news, the most we can hope for now is that during filming, Kevin James is eaten by one of the animals which will be by far the funniest thing James ever did in his career.