There's a wicked rumor going around that Angelina Jolie (In the Land of Blood and Honey) may be in the director's chair for the Fifty Shades of Grey adaptation, the Twilight fan-fiction turned bestseller (with over 10-million copies purchased) written by British author E. L. James and noted for its explicit sex scenes involved BDSM.  Keep in mind that the feature has yet to land a producer or a writer.  Add to it the fact that Universal (who bid a seven-figure sum for rights to the three novels) denies any conversations have been had.  Jolie is reportedly focused on Maleficent at this time and isn't entertaining other offers.  But, hey, stranger things have happened right?  Hit the jump for more on Fifty Shades of Grey.  Deadline is floating fifty-shades-of-grey-angelina-joliethe idea that Jolie may direct Fifty Shades of Grey.  I'd prefer it if they stuck with the original name, Master of the Universe. And does the writing credit go to James or her original pseudonym, Snowqueens Icedragon?  I don't blame James; this whole thing just got blown out of proportion and she's capitalized on it like any good-hearted free-market citizen should.  If anything, I've learned these simple steps to success:

  • 1) Write fan-fiction for a critically panned but commercially successful novel
  • 2) Add lots of "alternative" sexual scenes
  • 3) Change the names of your characters, title and yourself
  • 4) Reap the rewards.

Having said that, please keep an eye out for my new book The Erotically Magical Tale of Harold Potson and Friends by Ashlord Firepossum.  Here's the book description for James' Fifty Shades of Grey (via Amazon):

When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.

Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.

Erotic, amusing, and deeply moving, the Fifty Shades Trilogy is a tale that will obsess you, possess you, and stay with you forever.

*I apologize for the sheep above, but I needed an image as ridiculous as the headline and as absurd as the whole Fifty Shades of Grey epidemic.  Be careful out there, kiddos.  It's a crazy world!