When last we left our dynamic sextuplet, the mystery of Coulson’s resurrection was revealed….sort of!  The gang was reunited, as most of Centipede was either dead or in S.H.I.E.L.D. jail.  This week, Coulson and May going it alone to uncover hidden truths regarding Skye’s past, while the rest of the team is forced to batten down the hatches as a killer storm threatens S.H.I.E.L.D. academy! Will the team manage to reunite and learn more of the secrets behind Coulson and Skye? Will Centipede strike again through their newest recruit, Mike Peterson?  Hit the jump as we recap the latest episode of Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., “Seeds”.

We start the episode at Xavier’s School for the Gift...I mean S.H.I.E.L.D. academy where we find a few students swimming in the pool, who are then threatened by ice from nowhere! Luckily, the students are able to escape the evil ice, not before showing off their S.H.I.E.L.D. standard-issue bathrobes. Meanwhile, the team tries to understand what Agent Coulson is going through after learning, from last week’s episode, that his resurrection was not only instrumented by Nick Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D., but it was a painful process where Coulson was begging to die, while a robot methodically worked on his brain.

But enough about that, it’s time for the gang to look into what’s happening at S.H.I.E.L.D. university!  Agent Ward reveals to Skye that there are different schools for the agency to train upcoming agents and a rivalry has developed between the science school and the operations school.  I have to wonder what exactly the writers were thinking when they came up with the idea of this worldwide spy organization having giant universities made for the strict purpose of adding to their seemingly endless ranks.  I know the school has been referenced a few times in prior episodes, it just seems outlandish and hard to believe, even in a world with Hulk!  The main plotline of the episode with Fitz, Simmons, Skye, and Ward was just spinning its wheels as the gang tries to discover who is icing students to death. Does anyone remember that this show is set in the Marvel Universe anymore?

agents-of-shield-seeds

While this is happening, May and Coulson look further into the mystery of Skye’s origin, by following an ex-S.H.I.E.L.D. agent who saved Skye’s life when she was a baby.  This plotline is slightly better than the main story, as Coulson continues to reel from the truth of his resurrection and the two agents do some actual espionage, albeit in what has to be the least inconspicuous car of all time in “Lola”, Coulson’s bright flying red convertible.  This story actually got a legitimate laugh from me as Coulson tells May that the time for secrets is over, at which point she blurts out that she’s been having sex with Agent Ward, only to be immediately cut off by Phil to follow the ex-agent. From there, May and Coulson learn that Skye may in fact have super powers! A little out of nowhere but okay, another subplot to add to the pile.

Back at S.H.I.E.L.D. High, the agents must infiltrate the secret nightclub/bar in the basement of the school to learn more about who is creating the icy situations that plague the students. Now before I continue, just read the last sentence and take in the fact that S.H.I.E.L.D., the espionage agency that helped to form The Avengers, not only has a school dedicated strictly to teaching kids science, but it also has a bumping nightclub, The Boiler Room, in the basement. I feel like the writers have no idea what S.H.I.E.L.D. is supposed to even be at this point, outside of a large organization that fights crime sometimes. After Fitz bonds with a student who reminds him of himself, he discovers that said student is also responsible for the ice problems and is selling them to the evil businessman (from an earlier episode) named Quinn! The ice student and friend, in trying to prove their device works, creates that storm I mentioned at the beginning of the recap. The storm is dealt with, one of the students survives, while the other is hinted to become the supervillain, Blizzard.

marvels agents of shield seeds

This episode was the very definition of "by the numbers" and has continued S.H.I.E.L.D.’s unfortunate tendency of creating more mysterious subplots, while completely abandoning others to be answered vaguely at some other time in the future. Everything seems so small, if that makes sense.  The agents are tackling a bunch of renegade students with a weather machine and Coulson, having discovered that S.H.I.E.L.D. has been screwing him over six ways from Sunday, continues to just be a part of the organization, except now he’s scowling while he does it.  We need to see repercussions from, well, ANYTHING.  If you were to look at these characters from the very first episode of the series, do you get the feeling that they’ve changed at all? Even with all the information that’s been given, I feel like the characters haven’t really progressed much past their original archetypes.

It’s one thing to have too much going on, but S.H.I.E.L.D.’s cardinal sin this time around is how boring it was.  Nothing seemed like it was actually at stake and so nothing mattered. The characters all served their usual functions, but that’s just not enough at this point.  The show needs to make some serious changes, because as it stands, “The Bus” is in a tailspin.

Grade: D

Agents of M.I.S.C.E.L.L.A.N.E.A:

- Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. drinking game: take a shot every time the secret espionage agency’s logo is shown.

- Buy your very own S.H.I.E.L.D. bathrobe now while supplies last!

- How many S.H.I.E.L.D. academies are there exactly?

- “Bad seed isn’t a S.H.I.E.L.D. term, its just a term.”

- “Fitz looks younger than all of us.” “You’ll be jealous. Jealous in your wrinkly old pants.”

-”No more secrets.” ”Agent Ward and I have been having sex.”

Watch the promo for next week's episode of Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. featuring Stan Lee: