[Editor's note: The following contains spoilers for Mortal Kombat (2021).]
For a certain generation raised on Surge and dreams of climbing the Aggro Crag, the word "fatality" means more than its dictionary definition; it means hitting the right button combo to rip your buddy's spine out of their butt to the cheers of your local arcade crowd. Mortal Kombat, the only video game franchise you are legally obligated to scream, has a hit-or-miss history of being translated to the screen. The latest attempt, director Simon McQuoid's HBO Max-streaming 2021 film Mortal Kombat, gets a fair amount wrong—three-act structure, fight scene editing, not putting the Mortal Kombat tournament in a Mortal Kombat movie, etc etc—but what it absolutely understands is the gleefully over-the-top violence of a good old-fashioned fatality. So! We're going to rank the various limb-snaps and head-pops of 2021's Mortal Kombat, based on a rigid set of parameters such as framing, choreography, execution, and how much it made me yell "hell yeah" out loud.
Quick note: For this list, we're defining a fatality as "one Mortal Kombat character kills another Mortal Kombat character, to death." Sub-Zero (Joe Taslim) stabbing Scorpion (Hiroyuki Sanada) with a frozen knife he made from Scorpion's own blood is the most baller two seconds in film history, but unfortunately, no fatality. (For the record, it made me yell "hell yeah" at a pitch only discernable to dogs and birds.)
Without further ado, here is every fatality in the new Mortal Kombat movie, ranked.
9. Kano Gets Garden Gnome'd
"Oh, I've got an idea," Sonya Blade (Jessica McNamee) says when she's assigned to take out the double-crossy Aussie, Kano (Josh Lawson). The "idea" turns out to be getting the absolute shit kicked out of her, flying through a window, landing next to a garden gnome, and jamming the lawn ornament into Kano's eye. I simply cannot fault the effectiveness, but it's (ironically!) not exactly the most visually exciting moment of the movie.
8. Hole-y Sh*t
One of the most unfortunate aspects of Mortal Kombat is the extreme lame-ening(TM) of Sonya Blade. The character's most badass moment—shooting a goddamn laser beam straight through Mileena (Sisi Stringer) in a perfectly Looney Tunes-esque circle—happens so fast it barely registers. Let Sonya Blade Be Cool 2022.
7. Your Soul Is Mine
Shang Tsung (Chin Han) saying "your soul is mine" and sucking some fool's lifeforce out of his body is like Lynyrd Skynyrd busting out "Freebird." It's the hits. It's a classic. You absolutely cannot go wrong. However, something about the execution in this movie just comes off as...very, very funny. This demonic warlock shape-shifter from the hell-dimension known as Outworld looks like he's enjoying a nice frosted treat on a warm summer's eve. There's also the fact that, at this point, we met Kung Lao (Max Huang) roughly 12 minutes prior and could not care any less about this happening to him.
6. Goro Gets Gutted
Soon after deciding that training to save the universe is actually too hard and he'd rather just go home, Cole Young (Lewis Tan) discovers his inner power comes from getting his ass kicked. Cole proceeds to harness this power and open up 500-year Mortal Kombat champion Goro like a goddamn birthday party pinata. Look at how they massacred my beautiful four-armed boy. Disrespectful. I can't argue this scene doesn't score high marks on the video game violence scale, but it also highlights one of the bigger problems with the movie, overall. Please stop hiring martial artists like Lewis Tan—who, when given the chance, moves so fast on camera I'm not convinced he is of this Earth*—and having him flail around at some CGI.
*Watch Wu Assassins!
5. Heart In Hand
Look, a violent mercenary punches a reptile monster so hard in the chest he grabs its still-beating heart and then says a famous line from a video game as if he somehow understands he is just a construct of a pop culture franchise. This is what Martin Scorsese is referring to whenever he discusses the concept of cinema.
4. Jax Pops a Motherf*cker's Head
Nathan Jones has one line of dialogue in Mortal Kombat, and that line is "aaagghhhhh," and yet he still plays a vital role in one of the movie's best moments. That role is to sit there while Jax (Mehcad Brooks) palm-slaps both sides of his skull so hard that it bursts like a Gusher in a microwave. I want this moment to play on a loop on my bedroom ceiling so it's the first thing I see upon waking.
3. Scorpion Spits Fire
The climax of this film sees Scorpion dragging his ass out of literal hell and into a mixed martial arts cage to melt his nemesis to death with demon breath. Absolute icon shit. If I was murdered by an immortal cryomancer I would simply stay dead and in hell, but that's what makes Scorpion the king. The one, single reason this moment loses points is because we aren't given a three-episode mini-series explaining how someone earns the nickname "Scorpion" while living in hell for several centuries.
2. Liu Kang Summons a Dang Fire Dragon
My man Kabal (Damon Herriman) went out like a shady lawyer sitting on a Jurassic Park toilet, just absolutely chomped to shit by a fire dragon Liu Kang (Ludi Lin) pulled out of his sleeve. The sheer, utter joy that is the sight of a flaming beast of lore snacking on Kabal's head is tempered only by the objective funniness of the fact Liu Kang only does this once. If my teammate on an elite fighting force destined to save humanity from annihilation suddenly pulled this fire dragon move out of his ass, I'd have several dozen questions about why he is not constantly summoning the fire dragon. None of that detracts from the fatality itself. 10/10, would tattoo across my chest.
1. Kung Lao: From the Book of Saw
Anyone unfamiliar with the Mortal Kombat franchise would assume the man whose main thing is "has a sharp hat" wouldn't be your go-to character for gnarliness. So it was probably a little surprising when Kung Lao used his deadly headgear to split Nitara (Mel Jarnson) in twain. Crown to butt. Crown to butt. Good lord, the disrespect of this moment. I don't even think the audience has time to learn Nitara's name before Kung Lao mounts her back with all the grace of a spring breaker after six Bud Light Limes and runs her face straight into a meat slicer. A meat slicer he sometimes wears as a hat. Imagine if someone whipped off their Stetson fedora and beheaded you with it. This absolute mad man says "flawless victory" and puts the damn hat back on his head. This is the gnarliest thing to happen in Mortal Kombat (2021). This is the gnarliest thing you can currently see on HBO Max, period. Go ahead and check.