Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker), Samantha (Kim Cattrall), Charlotte (Kristin Davis), and Miranda (Cynthia Nixon). Apart, they are four individual girlbosses, taking on New York City in style and overpriced heels that no one really wears anymore (except for Miranda, she’s in sensible footwear). When they’re together, they are a force to be reckoned with. Don’t even think about cutting the queue for that new brunch spot, because Samantha knows the owner and Miranda probably flashed one of the waiters. The group seems like a pack that nothing can come between; they support, love, and comfort one another... almost all the time.
Sex and the City follows the lives of these four best friends, but how exactly do they perform in said role? We’re ranking the four ladies against each other based on how good a friend they actually are. From Carrie’s obsessive narcissism to Charlotte’s judgemental conservatism, things might get ugly, but it’s all in the name of crowning our deserved victor.
4. Carrie
There’s a reason Carrie is the main character, because she is the most self-absorbed person clobbering around New York City. When has Carrie not made a situation about herself? Charlotte literally gets engaged to the love of her life and gets maybe 10 seconds to talk about it before we hear about that Berger Post-It again. And lest we forget her sending Aidan over to save Miranda when she put out her neck in the shower? Miranda even tries to call Carrie out on it, saying that the bagels she brought over were “I want to talk about Aidan bagels” and what do you know? Carrie still makes it about her and Aidan. Poor Miranda can’t even turn her head to try to focus on a spot on the wall to drown out Carrie’s wailing.
It might seem like Carrie is a good friend because, to be fair to her, she’s not that judgmental. But that's because she’s too busy thinking about herself. However, Carrie did show her true colors when Samantha gave the delivery boy a blowjob — "that is something I would never do." From yapping on about Nina Katz whilst Miranda (and Samantha) struggle with motherhood to dismissing Miranda’s cries for help in her midlife identity/sexuality crisis in ...And Just Like That (sorry, Carrie, but some pee isn’t as dramatic as a midlife crisis), Carrie is undoubtedly the worst friend in the Sex and the City universe.
3. Charlotte
Charlotte, although technically “the sweet one” of the group, isn't exactly the ideal bestie. For one, she has the most antiquated views of the group and slutshames Samantha on the regular. Charlotte isn’t necessarily malicious or bitter, but she lets her personal views and judgments get in the way when confronting issues with friends. She’s the only one in the group to judge Carrie for the affair with Big — and not even for that good a reason but the fact that she’s getting married in a few weeks. She was probably right to, however, since Carrie was being an asshole (as per usual) but compared to how Miranda and Samantha reacted? Friendship should be judgment-free, Char.
Charlotte doesn’t end up last on this list because she has her moments where it feels like she would do anything for a friend. She cried with joy and put her personal fertility issues aside to support Miranda after she decided not to get an abortion. She loans Carrie the money to buy her apartment and she literally spent some of her runs imagining what she would say to Big if she met him after he dumped Carrie at the altar (“I curse the day you were born!”). So, she may still seem like a 1950s housewife living a 00s lifestyle, and this causes her to make some unfair critiques of her friends, but she still is able to put her own troubles aside for her friends, which is something Carrie obviously struggles with.
2. Samantha
Ah, Samantha, she really was a god-tier friend. Judgment wasn’t in her vocabulary or even her bloodstream; she accepted you for who you were, and that never wavered. She saw the three other gals go through everything — debating abortion, affairs, sex troubles with husbands — and she was always ready to offer some of her bites of wisdom. Even children, the one thing Samantha hates more than bad sex or clingy men, didn’t stop her from her duties when she gave an over-exhausted Miranda her exclusive hair appointment and babysat Brady. She even put her own spin on motherly responsibility and entertained Brady with a vibrator. A Samantha quote that is emblematic of her approach to friendship comes when Carrie tells her about the Big affair and Carrie expects Samantha to berate her - "not my style."
Samantha was the only one to get Carrie to eat during the first few days of her depression-moon in Mexico because she knows exactly how to deal with her friends in whatever situation (except Charlotte sometimes). Another perfect Samantha friendship moment? Even after being shamed by Charlotte on her approach to sex, she still answers the phone and indulges Charlotte in all her details about her less-than-two minutes sex with Trey (Kyle MacLachlan). And come on, holding down your vomit to hear about Trey sex is as good a friend as you could possibly get. Honorable mention goes to her clawing out Carrie’s diaphragm after just getting a fresh set. The only thing that doesn't put Samantha in the top spot? Let’s be honest, Samantha doesn’t always engage in her friend’s dramas, and it takes a lot to get her into the nitty-gritty of the situation.
1. Miranda
And we have our winner. Miranda, the cynical, sardonic funny one, may not seem like a great friend on the surface. She pokes fun at her friends' distresses and sometimes doesn't seem to care at all, but when the going gets really tough, Miranda will be the first one at their side. One scenario that perfectly sums up Miranda as a friend is when she bumps into a weeping Charlotte, who can't face Miranda as she can't accept that Miranda has gotten pregnant first. Charlotte says she wants to walk alone and Miranda lets her, but quietly walks behind her to make sure that Charlotte gets home okay.
What makes Miranda a cut above Samantha is that being there for her friends is so much more difficult for her. Miranda, although having the most stressful life out of the four with a high-flying job and a child and a Steve (David Eigenberg), has the ability to be there, and her support of her friends never wavers. Miranda will always listen, no matter what is going on in her own life and although it can initially come across as mean or ridiculing (like calling Carrie needy when it comes to Big), her intentions are always well-meaning. She’s willing to talk about things that make her uncomfortable to support and comfort her BFFs. It isn't easy for Miranda to dig deep into her emotional side, and that's what makes her a true friend.