Okay, I'm just going to be upfront with you: The following are not the real titles for the upcoming Spider-Man 3, the next chapter in Tom Holland's MCU take on the webslinging superhero. I'm telling you this because when I recently looked at Holland and fellow castmate Jacob Batalon and Zendaya's social media accounts and saw their "title announcements," and took them at face value, I nearly fainted at how silly they were. Luckily for us, that's the point; they're goofing with us! And to cut the jokes with some real intel, they've also provided our real, first images from the film's production.
Let's tackle the images first. We see Holland, Batalon, and Zendaya together in a pair of shadowy, sepia-toned images. Holland is fully Peter Parker here, no Spider-suit at all. And the three seem to have stumbled their way into haunted looking house or basement, staring off in that kind of terrifying/awe-inspiring wonder you get in a classic Spielberg kinda shot. What are they looking for? What did they find? Is Spider-Man 3 gonna feel like The Goonies? Have they stumbled upon the multiverse-maker? Why is Zendaya's outfit so cool?
And now... the fake titles. We've had Spider-Man: Homecoming and Spider-Man: Far From Home, leading many to believe the third will also have a "home theme." And when Holland posted earnestly it would be called "Spider-Man: Phone Home," my brain just about blew up in "this can't be correct" incomprehensible energy. Batalon's fake title, "Spider-Man: Homewrecker," is at least a little more real-feeling, though it does imply the film will be a '90s domestic thriller about Peter Parker busting up a happy marriage (which, like, let's see that movie!). And in Zendaya's take, we've got the hip "Spider-Man: Homeslice," which is obviously about Peter Parker's old school hip-hop/breakdancing team earning enough money to keep their community center open. All in all, this is a very solid goof, one designed to rile up fans and dorks like me into disbelief and eventual laughter.
Check out the first official images from Spider-Man 3 — and the absolutely fake-ass titles — below, courtesy of the cast. As for what Spider-Man 3 will actually be called... I have a feeling we'll find out soon enough.
