Part of me hopes that The New Mutants never gets released. That's not because I think it will be bad or because I hold any ill will against director Josh Boone. I just think it's hilarious that the film has been delayed almost a half-dozen times. Let's run the calendar, shall we?

The original release date for the movie was April 13, 2018. Then it was scheduled for February 2019. Then they pushed it to August 2, 2019. Then it was pushed back to April 3, 2020. That last date had to be scrapped because of COVID-19 and theaters shutting down. There was speculation that Disney, which now owns the 20th Century Fox-produced X-Men spinoff, would just cut their losses and dump the movie on either Hulu, Disney+, or some other direct-to-VOD platform. But no! The New Mutants cannot be shuffled off to home viewing! It can only be delayed.

And so now it has a new release date: August 28, 2020. Disney is betting that by this time, theaters must be reopened, right? Life will have returned to some semblance of normalcy and you can finally release this superhero movie? I'm betting not! Aside from The New Mutants having the special ability of being pushed back on the calendar, I have no faith that theaters will be running as usual by August, it's a weird way for Disney to finally just shuffle the movie off. Once you accept that the U.S. has no plan whatsoever other than waiting for a vaccine and letting countless people die in the meantime, the notion of theatrical release dates doesn't make a lot of sense. To be fair, it makes slightly more sense for something like The New Mutants, which was never going to be a massive hit, as opposed to a studio tentpole. Maybe half-filled theaters are the best fate possible for The New Mutants. But I wouldn't be surprised if the film either slips again or resigns its self to a streaming fate.

The film stars Maisie Williams (Game of Thrones) as Wolfsbane, Anya Taylor-Joy (Split) as Magik, Charlie Heaton (Stranger Things) as Cannonball, Henry Zaga as Sunspot, Blu Hunt as Mirage, and Alice Braga as Dr. Cecilia Reyes. Mark your calendars, but do it with a pencil.