With the Hulu How I Met Your Father spin-off show in full swing, fans are returning to its progenitor How I Met Your Mother.
While it can be easy to remember running gags like the ducky tie, slaps, and Robin Sparkles, How I Met Your Mother knows how to combine light-hearted comedy with deeper life lessons. As people re-watch this beloved series, hopefully, the life lessons the future Ted Mosby (Bob Saget) told his kid still stick true today.
“Game Night” — Season 1, Episode 15
"We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends. But those rare times when we do open up, it’s amazing how minor those secrets all end up seeming.”
Marshall (Jason Segel) hosts a game night for the gang, and Lily (Alyson Hannigan) mentions that she got a VHS tape from Barney’s very different past. For Barney (Neil Patrick Harris) to tell them the truth, each person has to reveal some of their own embarrassing stories.
The setting is so familiar — the audience can relate to a fun night with friends and the relentless teasing about someone’s social fails. Yet no matter how bad it seems, at the end of the day, friends should love each other despite past mistakes, and trust that they can open up without real judgment.
“Nothing Good Happens After 2 AM” — Season 1, Episode 18
“Kids, your grandma always used to say to me, ‘Kids, nothing good happens after 2 AM’. She was right. When 2 am rolls around, just go home and go to sleep.”
Ted (Josh Radnor) wants to break up with his long-distance girlfriend Victoria (Ashley Williams), but before he can do so, he gets a 2 AM invitation from his crush Robin. Ted knows he should go home, break up with Victoria, and then see Robin (Cobie Smulders), but he is tempted to do the opposite order. Even as a night owl, it is not recommended to make big life decisions after 2 AM. Ted is driven by adrenaline, the rest of the gang is not with him to keep him physically accountable, and he rationalizes lying to Robin to keep everyone happy.
In the end, he hurts both Victoria and Robin and faces serious consequences for his actions. It is frustrating for the audience because it all could have been avoided if Ted had just gone to bed and broken up with Victoria first. It is a good reminder to consider risky decisions after a good night’s sleep.
“Spoiler Alert” — Season 3, Episode 8
“You see when someone’s bad habits are pointed out to you, it’s hard to ignore them. But if you love them enough, those bad habits are easy to forget.”
While Ted's exes may not be the zaniest ex-girlfriends on TV, Ted tells the audience about an ex-girlfriend he is so infatuated with that he cannot see her obvious annoying habits. Against their better judgment, the gang reveals her habit of talking too much, and Ted’s perception of her is ruined. In retaliation, he points out the gang’s annoying habits, and everyone gets on each other’s nerves.
Friendship is not always smooth sailing. Sometimes all it takes is one pet peeve to set the whole group off, but it often stays within the circle. If an outsider looks in, friends still defend each other and realize that their happy memories together far outweigh the minor annoyances. It is normal to have fights, but true friends stick together.
“The Best Burger in New York” — Season 4, Episode 2
“And so after finally tasting again the burger he craved for so many years, Marshall got up the next morning, put on some pants, and went to work, and he never looked back.”
While many movies show off drool-worthy food, nothing compares to this episode's burger. After weeks of a discouraging job search, Marshall decides to take his mind off his stress by finding “the best burger in New York” that he had when he first arrived in the city. While the gang supports him, they also suggest that maybe his expectations are too high and that he is projecting his success in finding the burger onto his inability to find a job.
The episode is about embracing change and the importance of taking responsibility, even if it is not an ideal situation. Marshall learns that supporting him and Lily financially is more important than pursuing his dream job of being an environmental lawyer. He realizes that being an adult means making sacrifices for loved ones. Yet the gang does find the burger, so there is hope in the situation. Marshall knows that he can still find joy and meaning in a life that does not have all of his ideal dreams. Life is still worth enjoying.
“Hooked” — Season 5, Episode 16
“Honesty is tough, but in the end, it is the far kinder alternative.”
Ted thinks he is in a relationship with this new woman, but she is just using him. The gang recounts their own experiences of being on the “hook” and being the "hook"-er to help Ted realize his mistake.
A real relationship requires a mutual commitment, and the episode shows that using someone results in humiliation and hurt. Even though it can feel nice to be in control of another person, the gang learns that it is not fair to treat another person that way and to let them go. It can be hard to admit, but hooking someone or being on the hook wastes time and energy for everyone involved. Communication is key in setting boundaries.
“Last Words” — Season 6, Episode 14
“Last words — it’s a lot of pressure kids. It gets you thinking…”
Marshall’s father unexpectedly dies, and the gang rallies around him for support. When trying to think of a theme for the eulogy, Marshall panics as he tries to remember his father’s last words to him. The audience sees how people grieve differently and how to read the situation for what people need most. This also applies to last words and how people can treasure them, even if they may seem insignificant to an average person.
The episode also examines the reality of family. No one has a perfect family, and some relationships are more broken than others, but at the end of the day, they are still related. The gang is reminded of how precious life is and to be thankful for family that is still alive because they still have time to love them or try and mend relationships with them. The power of love surpasses any doubt over perfect last words or any broken relationships.
“Trilogy Time”— Season 7, Episode 20
“Kids, that was the one time I ever lost faith in the idea that my life would be better in three years. And what’s funny is, three years from that moment, my life was amazing.”
A tradition that began in college, Ted, Marshall, and eventually Barney watch the Star Wars trilogy every three years and project their hopes and dreams for the future with it. But as each trilogy time rolls around, Ted gets more discouraged.
Expectations do not match reality, but that is sometimes a good thing. Through all the ups and downs, the three men remain fast friends and support each other in everything. Life is not a smooth ride, but with good friends and happy memories, it is all still worth it. Sometimes, a low moment can even lead to something beautiful. In the final three years, it is revealed that Ted has married “the mother” and their baby daughter joins the trilogy-watching event. Life is different, but all is well.
“The Final Page: Part 1”— Season 8, Episode 11
“Kids, sometimes in life you’ll make a pit for someone in your mind. But ultimately, the only person in that pit is yourself, which means there’s only one person who can let you out of the pit.”
Marshall, Lily, Robin, and Ted face their demons when they each encounter a person that puts them on edge. The four try to justify their cold behavior, but in the end, they figure out that it is better to let go.
This episode is all about grudges and the destructive hold they have over people. A grudge will fester and not promote growth for either person. The “pit” is formed by one person as they try to rationalize their poor behavior. It is much healthier to forgive others and learn that each person is only in control of themselves, and they should not make assumptions and judge others unnecessarily.
“Something Old” — Season 8, Episode 23
“Kids, you can’t cling to the past. Because no matter how tightly you hold on, it’s already gone.”
Lily and Marshall prepare to move to Italy, and they want to get rid of a disgusting red bean bag chair. Ted insists they keep it because he fears if they let go of the chair, they will also let go of their friendship. Change is scary, especially change that involves close friends. It is only natural that Ted would feel like he is losing his best friends because they all have to get used to a different way of life.
However, that is not a bad thing, and true friends stick together no matter the circumstances. Clinging to the past only wastes time in the present that could be spent with loved ones, and it ignores the possibilities for the future. While Ted faces a familiar fear, he learns it is better to let go and be excited about the new chapter in his friends’ lives.
“Gary Blauman” — Season 9, Episode 21
“You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That’s why, when you find someone you wanna keep around, you do something about it.”
In one of the final episodes of the show, Ted tells the Mother about how the wedding party disagreed over an unexpected guest Gary Blauman (Taran Killam). Barney kicks him out, and Marshall wonders if they will ever see him again. Eventually, Blauman comes back because he did not want to miss the wedding.
Friends come and go, and it takes effort to maintain relationships in life. While friendship can create core memories, it also involves time, compromise, honesty, and love. They should not be one-sided, and as the wedding party learns, it is also ok to give someone a second chance. Friendships and romantic relationships are a gift, but they require active effort to maintain.