Editor's note: The below contains spoilers for Season 2 of The White Lotus.
Welcome to the penultimate episode of The White Lotus Season 2. "Abductions" finds the group ready for day six at the resort and several developments have taken place. Ethan (Will Sharpe) and Harper Spiller (Aubrey Plaza) are having some real marital issues. Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) is trying to play big sister to her naive assistant, Portia (Hayley Lu Richardson), and also struggling to come to terms with her shocking revelation at the end of Episode 5.
Meanwhile, the DiGrasso men are all walking on eggshells around Albie (Adam DiMarco) and Lucia (Simona Tobasca) as she joins them on their way to find Bert's (F. Murray Abraham) Italian relatives. And finally, last week's frontrunner, Mia (Beatrice Granno) is making quite the impression with her siren songs behind the piano while also presenting Valentina (Sabrina Impacciatore) with a little birthday gift — Marilyn Monroe style.
The Spiller Equation
What's this? Harper volunteering to hang out with Cameron? Blasphemy. After a little heart-to-heart about the lack of sex in their relationship, the Spillers' trip has continued to veer way off course. Harper coming clean with Ethan about wanting to have more sex in their marriage has them both acting very strangely throughout the episode. Seeing her pal around with Cameron is pretty unnerving, we have to admit. If she's trying to make Ethan jealous, it's working.
As the two couples hit the beach, he reprimands Cameron for not helping to clear up the condom wrapper predicament while also accusing him of making a move on Harper. Later, the stressed-out Ethan even has visions of the two in the initial stages of amore. The worm has certainly turned for the couple as now Ethan's mind is spinning with thoughts of Harper's possible indiscretions. The very idea of his sexually frustrated wife seeking pleasure in Cameron's arms has him more livid than we've ever seen. Ethan is the one who has the death stare this time around, and that may not bode very well for Harper, who went so far as to use the "G" word with him... "gaslighting." Could there be real trouble in paradise?
Testa de L'Aqua!
Well, that wasn't quite the family reunion the DiGrasso men were hoping for, was it? With the ever-obnoxious Albie insisting they take his new love, Lucia with them, they head off to the tiny town of Testa de L'Aqua where they are accosted en route by a mysterious and angry man who appears to be following them. Sure enough, it's Lucia's pimp, and he is demanding she return to town with him and make good on her debts. Albie and Dominic (Michael Imperioli) take exception but show their true beta-male colors when confronted with the possibility of a tussle with the man (Christopher Moltisanti from The Sopranos would never have backed down so easily, for what it's worth).
What we can gather from the stare-down, though, is that there are still some locals hovering around the promiscuous escort. Could she be playing the long con on all three of the DiGrassos, or is she in real trouble? She later admits to Albie that the reason he chased her down is that she owed him money, but insisted that he not worry about it. The thing is, we all know that the love-struck Albie most likely will worry about it, so much so that he might be wandering into a beef with some unscrupulous Sicilians.
Tanya and Portia, You're Hostages!
It sure looks like Tanya is having fun, doesn't it? Tanya's cocaine-fueled evening with Quentin's (Tom Hollander) designated heterosexual from Palermo, Nicolo starts off well enough. A mysteriously rakish and gun-toting lover is all she could have hoped for, and maybe a little more? The Italian ringer wastes little time getting her into the mood with some truly classy European full-monty action. Tanya is snorting along, but her suspicions are still eating at her. Meanwhile, Jack (Leo Woodall) is getting blotto while keeping Portia away from the party. It turns out that the mercurial "nephew" of Quentin likes to talk when he gets blind drunk and some of the things he spills raise even more questions.
By the end of the episode, after having denied her request to get back to the palazzo party at Quentin's, and making several strange confessions about his relationship with his "uncle" (including the true, dire reality of Quentin's financial situation). It's pretty clear that both Portia and Tanya are starting to wonder if accompanying two strangers to an isolated mansion may not have been the best decision. You have to admit, it was quite the con. You probably would have fallen for it, too. These two are most definitely in hot water.
The Rocco Reduction
Having your dreams crushed on your birthday is the worst. After mustering the courage to ask resort hostess Isabella (Eleonora Romandini) out for drinks and coming up roses, Valentina quickly takes a cane to the back of the knees when she finds out that her crush is newly engaged to Rocco (Federico Ferrante). Yes, Rocco! Her whipping boy of a concierge. Now that is truly a gut punch.
As Valentina is drowning her sorrows to the sweet dulcet notes of the piano playing, she gets an unexpected pick-me-up from the local call-girl who decides to give the sexually inhibited resort manager a pro bono, Marilyn Monroe-style lesbian experience. Maybe these two can be friends after all. Let's hope for Rocco's sake that Valentina isn't carrying a torch for the unattainable hotel hostess. Of all the women on The White Lotus, surely Valentina's wrath is the most terrifying.
Our Final Body Bag Frontrunner: Portia
Getting to spend the day with a blind drunk Jack in Cefalu didn't turn out to be what Portia expected at all. The young man who claims to be Quentin's nephew from Essex is clearly troubled. You'd think that maybe they are meant for each other in a "birds of a feather" kind of way, but it doesn't feel like that to us. Jack has been in "a deep hole" and he's also sporting what appears to be a significant booze problem.
Not only is the vulnerable Portia away from the others back at The White Lotus, but she is also now even further isolated from Tanya and the group in Palermo. Something is definitely amiss. As a result, we have to award body bag frontrunner status to Portia, who, after a day with the sauced Jack, suddenly looks a lot more stable by comparison.
Previously: The latest episode of The White Lotus Season 2, titled "That's Amore," means we have only two weeks left to actually find out who, in fact, is in the body bag. Last week's frontrunner, Ethan (Will Sharpe) managed to make it through the night without his wife, Harper (Aubrey Plaza) killing him.
Meanwhile, Cameron (Theo James) has plans for the two married couples to do a little wine tasting in Etna. Albie's (Adam DiMarco) bubble was burst by Lucia (Simona Tobasco). Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) has summoned her assistant, Portia (Hayley Lu Richardson) to help her get ready for a yacht trip to Quentin's (Tom Hollander) Palermo palazzo for a two-night getaway, and by making a run as Giuseppe's job and Valentina's (Sabrina Impacciatore) sexuality, Mia (Beatrice Granno) may just be wading into some dangerous waters of her own.
A Drunk Harper Is on the Warpath
After Ethan came clean about the events that unfolded the night Harper and Daphne (Meghann Fahy) went to Noto, Harper is still seething and not completely sold on his assurance that the condom wrapper wasn't his. So when Cameron suggests a day of wine tasting, it's the perfect opportunity for her to muster a little liquid courage and ask some pointed questions about the boys and their sexual escapades in college.
Ethan also finally stands up to Cameron, accusing him of going after all the women that he's ever been interested in, who then responds in true Cameron fashion — by feeling up a buzzed Harper beneath the table at dinner — a completely unwarranted violation of the "bro-code." Meanwhile, Daphne's philosophy of "don't get mad, get even" may be starting to rub off on Harper as her compartmentalized unhappiness rears its ugly head once again. And what's up with Harper making eyes with Cameron? We'd pay good money to be inside her head and find out what makes her tick. As much as we'd like to dub Cameron as the body bag frontrunner every week, we're afraid that might not make for such compelling reading. These four are safe.
Yachts Amore and Tanya's Misadventures
Things are getting more serious between Portia and Jack (Leo Woodall), who, after spending the night together, are back at it on the yacht on the way to Quentin's palatial estate in Palermo. We detect some choppy waters ahead, however, as after a fun night out on the town together with Portia, Jack is witnessed (by Tanya) having sex with Quentin at the episode's end. Something tells us not only are the two charmers from Palermo not really related but could be playing Tanya and Portia in an effort to separate the naive tourists from a lot of cash. It all seems very nefarious, now that the two have left the sanctuary of the resort and are apparently trapped in Quentin's (or someone's) grand palazzo. Portia isn't going to be cool with this either (even though she'll probably say she is). Careful, Jack! We're pretty sure you don't want to dip your toes into the psychological cauldron that is her bad side.
Speaking of Tanya, she and Quentin also get very philosophical after an emotional visit to a classical Italian opera house where she sits next to the Queen of Sicily (not really). But a somber Quentin did reveal his affinity for beauty over anything and everything, and quoted his one-time house guest, Gore Vidal, in the process. The two really seem to have a connection. Let's hope her unexpected discovery of the copulating Jack and Quentin doesn't get her into any hot water. Everything we thought we knew about the British ex-pats is now off the table. And she was just now finding her Italian dream groove. Tanya can't seem to catch a break.
Wait... You're a What?
We would say "poor Albie," but his self-righteousness with his father Dominic (Michael Imperioli) and grandfather Bert (F. Murray Abraham) is getting a little obnoxious. So we weren't too terribly saddened to see him get a little reality slap when he found out that Lucia was an escort and wanted to be paid for her services. But our inkling from last week's episode was correct in that Lucia wants her relationship with Albie to be a real, non-business one. Much to Dominic's chagrin, the seemingly star-crossed pair appear to have something genuine on their hands.
Also grinding Dominic's gears is his concussed and sometimes flatulent father, who nearly let it slip that he and his son have shared the same woman. The two finally have it out on why Albie is like Dominic, who is like Bert because he claims that his father never showed him how to express his love properly and be a good role model for Albie. Bert isn't having it, though, and rejects the idea that he was an emotionally distant, philandering husband and father. This all seems like family matters that needed to be hashed out anyway, so we're marking all the DiGrasso men as safe for now.
Our Episode 5 Body Bag Frontrunner: Mia
Sadly, we're headed into the final episodes of Season 2 of The White Lotus, but we also have a new frontrunner after this week. Since spending most of the season as Lucia's apprentice, Mia has started to assert her own wants and needs. After she accidentally slips slimy piano man Giuseppe a mickey the night before that sends him on an incredibly bad trip, it turns out there's an opening for a mellifluously-voiced ivory tickler in the dining room. When she approaches the notoriously surly resort manager, Valentina, about filling the vacancy, something tells us that she has taken a horribly wrong turn and unwittingly wandered into a precarious position. When Mia uses Valentina's homosexuality as a tool to get the gig, you can tell that the tightly wound manager feels emotionally violated and exposed.
We may be way off here, but doesn't it just seems like something show creator and writer Mike White would do to us? Valentina has been primarily in the background this season, rarely appearing outside the hotel lobby where she barks at concierge Rocco (Federico Ferrante) and surreptitiously pines for hostess Isabella (Eleonora Romandini). Though she hates men, she's not a fan of the two young hustlers that keep making her job so difficult. Having said that, we're going to give final body bag honors to Mia, who has put the screws to the hotel one time too many, and it could prove to be her downfall. Congratulation, Mia, but we hope we are wrong — because we think pretty much everyone would rather see Cameron underneath the zipper.
Previously: Wakey, wakey! It's time for a little breakfast buffet with the group at The White Lotus in Episode 4, called "In the Sandbox." There was a very palpable Three's Company vibe this time around, as some misunderstandings and sexual hijinks stole the show. At the center of the fun and games were Portia (Haley Lu Richardson) and Albie (Adam DiMarco), whose relationship took an unexpected detour.
Meanwhile, Harper (Aubrey Plaza) and Ethan (Will Sharpe) are having a real problem, but it's not what you think. Lucia (Simona Tabasco) and Mia (Beatrice Granno) are continuing their sexual conquest of the White Lotus men, and the arrival of a few newcomers ushers in a new hope for Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) that she may be able to turn her Italian dream vacation around.
Hello, Quentin!
Things really took a turn for Tanya, didn't they? New character Quentin (Tom Hollander) appears to be just what the doctor ordered to direct a 180 in what has been a heartbreaking first couple of days for the lovably eccentric wife. The outgoing British expat from Palermo is at the White Lotus with his partner Matteo and nephew Leo (more on that below). He and Tanya hit it off immediately; he loves her Monica Vitti-esque fashion sense, and she can't get enough of his gregarious, bon vivant outlook.
Within just a few hours (and a few glasses of rose) Quentin has Tanya looking forward to his much-ballyhooed villa soiree and promises her a bevy of Italian men to choose from, should she be so inclined. Is Tanya thinking, "what's good for the goose is good for the gander?'" Maybe it is time to turn the tables on Greg (Jon Gries). What he doesn't know won't hurt him, right? It remains to be seen if the good-for-nothing Greg has other suitors to deal with when he returns from the States. For now, however, we'll mark both of them as safe.
Hello, Random Guy From the Pool!
So, there is a reason that some random guy was making eyes at Portia when Albie was making his move poolside in last week's episode. Jack (Leo Woodall) is Quentin's nephew from Essex, and he doesn't waste any time throwing a monkey wrench into whatever was potentially brewing between our young guests. It looks as if Portia has put her emotional baggage aside for the time being and is diving headfirst into some fun with the charming young Brit.
Much to Albie's chagrin, the fast-moving newcomer has firmly positioned himself between the two, and she seems okay with it. In fact, she appears to be really into Leo, but could she be trying to make Albie jealous after her day drinking turned into night drinking? And maybe the reverse is true as well, as the youngest DiGrasso also moves on from Portia to hook up with last week's body bag frontrunner, Lucia (Simona Tabasco), who is going through the DiGrasso men like Greg goes through wives.
Back-to-Back Frontrunner Status?
Lucia is certainly not doing anything to distance herself from the body bag as she capped the episode off by engaging in relations with Albie. Like father like son, right? But unlike his father, Dominic (Michael Imperioli), poor Albie doesn't know the transactional nature of the encounter. Something tells us that Lucia's lamentations earlier in the episode about being judged by others for being an escort and getting tired of the game are a little foreshadowing from always-clever showrunner Mike White. Maybe there's more to the relationship than we think.
We won't give Lucia back-to-back nods, but she definitely remains high on the list. Not to be overlooked either is Mia, who slips Giuseppe a mickey by accident. The mistake sends the lascivious piano man on an unexpected journey that ends up with him face-planting onto the dining room floor during dinner. At this point, we think it's prudent to just chalk up Mia's indiscretions in the chapel as a bit of comic relief, but maybe that's exactly what White wants us to do.
The Bro-Code Meets 'Three's Company' Hijinks!
So we knew that while Harper and Daphne (Meghann Fahy) were in Noto (because everybody has to go to Noto) that the boys would be up to no good. Cameron (Theo James) did, of course, sleep with both Lucia and Mia (Beatrice Granno), but left something behind in the bed sparking a huge misunderstanding that sent Harper into a state of incredulity/anger/bewilderment that lasts for the duration of the episode. Already suspicious of her husband when she finds Cameron's empty condom wrapper in the bed, she assumes it's Ethan's and goes into an almost out-of-body stupor that leaves her somewhere between speechless and seething.
Now, we all know that Ethan was not unfaithful, and even though he agrees to a "bro-code" (eyeroll) with Cameron that is marked with a fist bump, he has absolutely no clue what she is thinking. It wasn't very difficult to see that Harper was extremely upset, however, but upset enough to catapult Ethan to body bag frontrunner status? Her eyes were burning a hole through her unwitting husband when they sat down to lunch. Remember, Hell hath no fury, and so forth.
Our Episode 4 Body Bag Frontrunner: Ethan
We just can't get that stare Harper gave Ethan at lunch out of our heads, you know? It was truly chilling. If looks could kill, well, then Ethan would be six feet under right about now. We need to have this dramatic irony cleared up a bit before we let go of her haunting gaze. We know that it's nothing, but with only two episodes left, is there time enough for her to find out that she was right about Cameron, and all Ethan is guilty of is entering into the solemn "bro-code" with the toxic tech executive?
Until we get some sort of clarification regarding the nature of Harper's misunderstanding and spine-tingling, "death gaze," we would be remiss not to slot the honest and innocent Ethan into body bag frontrunner status after this week's episode. It's not that we want to, but what the heck was Harper thinking about when she suddenly decides to take leave of the table and take a stroll to the end of that pier?
Previously: The sun has risen, and it's a new day at The White Lotus as the gang is ready to take on day three in Episode 3 of Season 2 entitled, "Bull Elephants." We find the guests separated into their familiar cliques discussing what's on the agenda. The young couples decide to split up as Daphne (Meghann Fahy) and Harper (Aubrey Plaza) are off to the small but picturesque city in the southeastern part of Sicily called Noto, leaving Cameron (Theo James) and Ethan (Will Sharpe) to go stag at the resort.
Meanwhile, Bert (F. Murray Abraham) has planned a Godfather tour for the Di Grassos and their new fourth, Portia (Hayley Lu Richardson), so they can visit the Sicilian locations that were used in the 1972 classic. Lastly, our frontrunner from last week's episode, Greg (Jon Gries) and the weepy Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) are still butting heads over his return to the States.
A Girls' Trip
Daphne convinces a rejuvenated Harper — who is out to prove to her husband, Ethan, that she is not some wet blanket — to accompany her to Noto. After they manage to elude a pack of leering locals that circle the tourists like vultures over prey, Daphne wastes no time turning what was supposed to be a day trip to the city into an overnight escape at a grand Italian palazzo.
Once they've enjoyed a few drinks and indulged in a few edibles, they share what feels like their first honest conversation so far. Daphne warns Harper of their husband's work bros and men in general with a noticeable disdain. Referring to them as psychopaths and titular bull elephants, Harper seems to be a little concerned about the company Ethan keeps when he's away, but again it's Daphne that seems to be simmering with the pent-up hostility. She has already dropped subtle hints about her displeasure with Cameron's rakish lifestyle, and goes on to tell Harper rather ominously, "I'm not a victim." These two were definitely on a mellow trip, but we're still keeping an eye on Daphne, for sure.
While the Mice Are Away...
Left to their own devices, Cameron is up to his old tricks again with Ethan. After a bit of a tongue-lashing for not sharing inside information on Ethan's most recent business deal, Cameron takes his reluctant apprentice out on the Ionian Sea for some serious bro out time, and they play a little Jet Ski "chicken." At dinner, Cameron proceeds to "mansplain" the virtues of a patriarchal society driven by a natural proclivity to take as many sexual partners as possible, and what do you know? They run into Lucia (Simona Tabasco) and Mia (Beatrice Granno) who are desperately seeking some more wealthy tourists to sponge off of (more on that below).
It seems that the swinging Cameron and sexually aggressive Lucia hook-up was unavoidable. The combination of the party-seeking Cameron and the all-too-accommodating, drug-dealing local call girl has combustion written all over it. What could possibly go wrong? Lucia's drug dealing brings another element to the body bag equation. Did someone get the short end of the stick in a drug-fueled sex binge with her? Is Daphne really above doing away with her husband's debaucheries, like Lucia? The Mae West of Italy has certainly put a hard target on her back. Let's also keep an eye out for Mia and her relationship with the opportunistic piano player.
Dominic's Conscience Gets to Him
The new morning finds Dominic with Lucia, who he is paying quite handsomely to share a bed with him for the week. But after some comments from Bert and a heart-to-heart with his son, Albie (Adam DiMarco), Dominic's conscience gets the better of him. Wanting to prove to his son that he's a good father and a man capable of change, he ends his arrangement with Lucia who takes to the news just fine as we noted that she hooked up with Cameron later that evening. We'll see if Dominic is true to his word because it doesn't feel like he will be.
Poor Albie makes his move on a less than requiting Portia poolside after dinner (while a random swimmer looks on). It's abundantly clear that the young assistant has got some issues, but just how heavy is her emotional baggage? When you drop a line like, "If I murdered my boss, I think I could argue it was euthanasia," it has to make you think. Could she kill her domineering and demanding boss, Tanya? Maybe we're underestimating the young lady, but it seems like all bark and no bite so far.
Tanya's Trip Is Only Getting Worse
Last week, we posited that the jilted Tanya might be capable of killing her husband, Episode 2 frontrunner, Greg Hunt. The door is still open to that possibility as the scorned lover's romantic getaway has turned into a disaster that has her seeking out a local tarot card reader to see if she can glean any information about the future of their relationship. The tarot reader sees something bad and Tanya's not having it. She wants her fortune told, as long as it was what she wanted to hear. Depressed, she ends up taking to her bed, but not before demanding that Portia stay with her and read the new issue of Vanity Fair while she takes a nap.
Episode 3's Body Bag Front Runner: Lucia
We'll spare you the drum roll and get right to it. Lucia is wandering into some murky waters that we don't think she is fully aware of. She already dabbles in the kinds of things that could end in death by selling her company and peddling drugs to naive tourists. But how naive are they, really? Dominic has pulled away for the time being, but if she thinks Cameron is some Johnny-come-lately who just wants to have a good time, she is putting herself in serious danger. If there is one thing showrunner Mike White has made crystal clear in the first three episodes, it's that Cameron isn't necessarily all there in the head. He certainly doesn't seem to be above killing a girl who might try to leverage something out of him. In fact, we're so sure that he most likely would that we're giving frontrunner honors to Lucia, the local sex worker who may be getting in a little over her head with the sex, drugs, and tech bros. Ciao, Lucia!
Previously: The second episode of The White Lotus Season 2, titled "Italian Dream," changes our theory as to who is in the body bag in the premiere has changed. Last week, we posited that the most likely character to have ended up in the body bag was Theo James' Cameron Sullivan. The narcissistic tech bro's combination of passive-aggressiveness and dismissive haughtiness made him a good candidate for the little amount of information we had to go on at the time.
As the group awakens to a second beautiful day in Sicily, let's take a look at who made a move closer to the body bag and who seems safe at the moment.
Cameron Still Has Issues
At breakfast, it was starting to look like Cameron might retain his front-runner status, as he blows up on someone over the phone regarding his lost luggage and goes on to take some subtle shots at Harper Spiller's (Aubrey Plaza) Puerto Rican heritage. Meanwhile, it's also starting to feel like Cameron's adoring wife, Daphne (Meghann Fahy) is less of a flighty, well-meaning better half and more like an enabler of her husband who is also simmering with some anger issues of her own. They insist they're more than "materialistic pigs," and Cameron really wants Harper to like him. Though they seem to be oozing with wedded bliss, Harper may be onto what she thinks is just a happy facade that is really hiding some underlying discord between the two.
Harper's theory starts to look even better when, at dinner, Cameron and Daphne get a little heated over how difficult it is for her to handle their kids while Cameron seems oblivious to her troubles. Are her lamentations enough reason for Daphne to kill Cameron? It's unlikely, as she discovered the body floating in the Ionic Sea and would have to be a calculated, scheming sociopath to stage something like that. We're not buying it. This is subject to change, of course.
The Spillers Have a Few Secrets, Too
It's also worth noting that there are personal hang-ups the Spillers are dealing with, as well. Upon returning to their room, Harper catches Ethan (Will Sharpe) in a compromising position with his computer, resulting in some classic Plaza awkwardness and a little rift between the two.
Things get weird again at dinner when Ethan divulges very private issues about their trouble conceiving and intimate details about conflicting sexual appetites. He seems to have a level of resentment toward his wife, but not enough to raise any red flags yet. We're not getting too worked up over a few little arguments. As of now, Ethan and Harper are safely distanced from any and all body bags.
There's More Trouble in Paradise for the Hunts
As we noted after Episode 1, things are not exactly rosy between Tanya McQuoid Hunt (Jennifer Coolidge) and her husband, Greg (Jon Gries), and things don't appear to be getting much better. After a very touristy trip through the Sicilian coastal town doubling up on a tiny Vespa, the two appear to be having nothing short of a perfect first day together — that is, until they sit down to dinner and Greg informs Tanya that he is heading back to the States the next day to take care of some pressing business.
Expletives are then tossed over linguini before Tanya accuses him of not loving her and storms off. — and she may be right, as later that evening she catches Greg unaware as he's on the phone professing his love for someone else and planning a secret rendezvous. There's more to Tanya than her quirky goofiness, and Greg looks like he may be about to find out what her ugly side looks like. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. That is the kind of motive that we're looking for!
Checking In on the Di Grassos
This trio of Di Grasso men is really getting around, aren't they? To begin, flatulent patriarch Bert (F. Murray Abraham) is really pushing the envelope with his son Dominic (Michael Imperioli) about hs failing marriage back in California. That fall and bump on the head seem to have had an effect on Bert, with his happy-go-lucky attitude replaced by a noticeable disgust with his son's indiscretions and their effects on the entire Di Grasso family. Dominic's exasperation is growing, and you can see it on his face as they visit an ancient Sicilian amphitheater. He wouldn't do in his own father, would he?
Besides, much to the chagrin of the iron-fisted White Lotus manager, Valentina (Sabrina Impacciatore) he's taken up with local escort Lucia (Simona Tabasco) and her friend Mia (Beatrice Granno) who are back at the resort bleeding him dry with expensive charges to his room after he specifically asked them not to. Dominic seems to have a thing for Lucia, but she and Mia would be wise not to mistake Dominic's kindness for weakness. Something is definitely brewing in this threesome.
What's Up With Albie and Portia?
Love is in the air with the two youngest White Lotus guests as Albie (Adam DiMarco) and Portia (Hayley Lu Richardson) are spending a lot of time together. Could there be a real romance blossoming between the two? Albie seems a bit more sure that he would like to pursue a relationship with Portia, but she is a little more reticent. The frazzled assistant reveals she may "need to up her meds" and seems to be very unsatisfied with her life. She appears to be content using the week to find out more about herself, and maybe not so much about Albie. But it's early yet, and Albie doesn't seem to be backing down. We'll keep an eye on these two, but nothing to see here at the moment.
Episode 2 Body Bag Front Runner: Greg
This one seems like a "no-brainer," right? Greg, what are you thinking, man? You can't jerk a woman around like that and not expect some serious repercussions — and after she paid for the treatment that saved your miserable life? For shame. You better grow eyes in the back of your bald, two-timing head, because you've gone and screwed around on with the wrong woman, But congratulations, nonetheless, you made it very easy to establish yourself as the new front runner for a meeting with a body bag after two episodes of The White Lotus.
Previously: Season 2 of The White Lotus has kicked off with a whodunit start in Episode 1. While we're sure this question will be answered with the show's usual blend of dark humor and quirkiness in the coming weeks, we're obviously also quite interested in the mystery aspect of the new season — as in, which character was local authorities seen carrying off in the body bag on the sun-drenched beach of the White Lotus' Sicilian location? With a whole new cast of characters to choose from, the prevailing theory will be fluid and change from week to week.
After the first episode, who do we think was found floating in the Ionian Sea? We have an intriguing new group of visitors, Sicilian locals, and White Lotus staff this year joining Season 1 Hawaii holdovers Tanya McQuoid-Hunt (Jennifer Coolidge) and Greg Hunt (Jon Gries). Let's take a look at who will be enjoying a week-long stay at the resort and who is most likely to have met an untimely death in Mike White's second installment of the Emmy award-winning ensemble piece.
Is It Someone From the Two Couples Staying at The White Lotus?
Among the guests greeted at the dock with complimentary flutes of Prosecco is the squared-away, tightly-wound Harper Spiller (Aubrey Plaza). Maybe a week at the White Lotus is exactly what she needs to forget about her work as an employment lawyer representing the sexually harassed, discriminated, and wrongfully terminated. She is traveling with her husband, Ethan Spiller (Will Sharpe), who seems to have come into a good amount of new tech money and serves as the more laid-back, easy-going half of the couple. He spends most of the episode vouching for his old college roommate and friend, Cameron Sullivan (Theo James) a wealthy, tech entrepreneur who has invited the Spillers to join him and his wife Daphne (Meghann Fahey) at the White Lotus.
There is definitely tension between the two couples from the start. Harper and Cameron have gotten off on the wrong foot, but Cameron doesn't seem to have noticed. His charming but passive-aggressive style isn't going over well with Harper, who sees him as a get-rich-quick, cavalier name-dropper with an overabundance of self-confidence. To be blunt, she thinks he's a "douche" and isn't afraid to share her opinion with Will. In the limited time that we've gotten to know Cameron, she could be onto something. Aside from his dismissive attitude toward her legal work, the fact that he nonchalantly drops his drawers and exposes himself in front of her in their shared bathroom is serious cause for alarm. It comes across as both grossly narcissistic and blatantly unaware. Something is definitely not right with Cameron, but is it something that might land him in the body bag? The only one of these four that we can definitively rule out is his wife Daphne, as she was the one who swam directly into the floating body at the beginning of the episode.
Is It One of the Di Grasso Men?
Then there are three generations of Di Grasso men. Bert (F. Murray Abraham), Dominic (Michael Imperioli), and the youngest, Albie (Adam DiMarco). The colorful trio of Californians is staying at the White Lotus to visit Testa d'Laqua, the hometown of Bert's Sicilian parents. Aside from some occasional flatulence, Bert is a charmer who is quick to flirt with virtually every female he comes across. He's frank and has a sort of joie de vive attitude that you might find in a gentleman of an advanced age. Son Dominic is middle-aged and all too familiar with his father's antics. The Hollywood "muckity-muck," as Bert calls him, is leaving a tumultuous relationship with his exasperated estranged wife back in the States and is more than open to finding some local companionship with mercurial local escorts, Lucia (Simona Tabasco) and Mia (Beatrice Granno). His son, Albie, is often caught in the middle refereeing dad and grandad while also serving as the latter's babysitter/chaperone. There are some questions to be answered about the Di Grassos. Could Bert's comedowns have landed him in trouble with a fellow suitor or jealous husband? Maybe Dominic's relationship with one of the local call girls doesn't go over well with someone in town. Body bag worthy? We'll see.
Is There Trouble in Paradise for Fan-Favorite White Lotus Regulars?
Back for another stay at their favorite resort, Tanya and Greg Hunt (Coolidge and Gries) are looking for a romantic getaway, but things are off to a rocky start. First off, can't a girl eat a macaroon, or three, or five, without facing the Spanish Inquisition? So far, Greg is in quite the foul mood as he raises a stink to just about everything Tanya does — including bringing along her beleaguered assistant, Portia (Haley Lu Richardson) with whom he immediately has a problem, not to mention apparently snacking too much on macaroons.
The treatment she paid for seems to have cured Greg's terminal illness, but even the kindest and cookiest of people have a breaking point. Surely Tanya doesn't have rescuer's remorse and wants to send her ill-tempered husband to meet his maker — or even worse, get rid of her pesky assistant, who, despite being instructed to stay in her room for the week and not ruin her romantic escape, keeps popping up everywhere to pursue a romantic relationship with Albie. (Just for the record, Greg, it was three macaroons, not five.)
We Know the Staff Is Always Involved... Somehow
If the first season taught us anything, the White Lotus staff is just as involved in the storyline as their guests. This time around, resort manager Valentina (Sabrina Impacciatore) is a no-nonsense screw who runs a tight ship. Assistant Rocco (Federico Ferrante) is her poor underling who takes the brunt of Valentina's wrath. We don't get a lot of personal information on the staff in Episode 1, but disgruntled employees are known for wanting to see their hard-ass bosses in a body bag. Anything is possible, right? The sleazy restaurant piano player even seems like someone to keep an eye on.
Episode 1's Body Bag Front Runner: Cameron
As we stated at the outset, things are just getting started and the situation is a very fluid one. Each character is going to have a run at body bag status at some point, but after their conversation at lunch and the subsequent events in the bathroom, Theo James' Cameron has all the qualities you might expect to push a combination of all the wrong buttons and set someone off (yes, we caught Daphne's comment about wives killing their husbands on Dateline). Entitled, opinionated, passive-aggressive, and narcissistic, he has established a lead right out of the gate. Whether he maintains that advantage all the way into the body bag remains to be seen.
New episodes of The White Lotus Season 2 premiere each Sunday on HBO and HBO Max.